In recent years, I’ve witnessed an unsettling pattern: a group of naysayers seems determined to strip us of our cherished holidays. You might not have noticed, though, since their approach is subtle and sneaky.
This trend often kicks off around now, particularly targeting the ‘Big Three’ – Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. They seem to despise the joy these celebrations bring, but more so, they loathe the indulgence associated with them.
Every year, we’re inundated with suggestions like, “Opt for the veggie platter.” Really? A veggie tray at a holiday gathering is a slap in the face to those of us who love to celebrate. I don’t care if you’re on a strict cleanse leading up to the party; when you attend mine, you better come hungry.
I’m ready to take a stand against these joy-stealers. I envision myself channeling a warrior spirit, akin to Mel Gibson in Braveheart, rallying against the idea: “They can take our lives, but they will never take our holidays!”
Now, don’t get me wrong; I understand that some festivities have gone overboard and could use a reality check. If one more person asks me to create a leprechaun trap for St. Patrick’s Day, I might just lose it. But right now, let’s focus on Halloween.
Remember the days before social media turned everyone into experts on crafts? Before Pinterest set unrealistic expectations for our celebrations? Back then, people didn’t make spooky carrot fingers or turn clementines into pumpkins. And don’t even get me started on those “boo-riffic” banana creations. Absolutely not!
In the past, we indulged in Halloween with reckless abandon, devouring Butterfingers, ghost-shaped marshmallows, and candy corn. Yes, I said it – processed goodies!
So how do I plan to celebrate Halloween this year? I’m going back to basics. I’ll guide my kids through the ABCs of Halloween fun: A) Always trick-or-treat where the affluent live (obviously). B) Enjoy treats to the max. C) Coconut candy? No thanks. We’ll aim for houses that hand out Costco-sized candy bars (the whole dang bar!) and avoid those dishing out homemade snacks or raisins. Seriously, raisins on Halloween could lead to chaos.
I’ll make sure my kids choose their favorites when given the option (a mom’s gotta get her share, right?). We’ll munch on the loot as we walk from house to house; it’s all about energy! Once home, we’ll dump the candy onto the floor, count our treasure, and indulge some more. I’ll be right there with them during the inevitable sugar crash and when they inevitably crash on the bed after watching Hotel Transylvania past their bedtime. We’re rebels, after all!
The day after, we’ll restore order and sanity. I’ll portion out candy reasonably and donate the excess to our doctor’s office. We’ll eat healthily and rejoin the world.
But for one glorious day, we’re going to celebrate Halloween as it was meant to be enjoyed.
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In summary, let’s embrace the spirit of Halloween without the guilt or restrictions. Celebrate with joy, indulge in sweets, and remember the essence of fun during this holiday.