As a physician and a parent, I often ponder the implications of dress codes on young girls. A question that arises frequently is this: Are leggings considered pants or merely tights? It’s a topic that stirs debate and contemplation.
Recently, I found myself dropping off my daughter, Lily, at her new middle school. At just twelve years old, she’s at the bottom of the middle school hierarchy, navigating an environment filled with unfamiliar locker combinations, class schedules, and a myriad of rules. My own memories of middle school revolve around a time of rebellion: my first party, my first crush, and my introduction to music that shaped my teen years.
Lily, however, is a different spirit altogether. She’s a shy, creative girl who prefers basketball shorts and T-shirts emblazoned with her favorite movies. She shies away from the spotlight, which sometimes worries me. I’ve made a concerted effort to be the body-positive influence I never had, and until that fateful day, I thought I was succeeding.
Just a mile from the school, my phone buzzed. It was Lily, her voice trembling with tears. “Mom, I need you to bring me different clothes. I need jeans.” I didn’t even have time to ask what was wrong.
When I returned with jeans and a few pads tucked away for good measure, I sensed that whatever had transpired was deeply embarrassing for her. I wanted her to know that being a girl is not a burden, even amidst the chaos. In the office, Lily waited, and I handed her the bag while discreetly passing her the makeup bag. She hurried off to change, leaving me in the front office.
“It’s so embarrassing,” the secretary remarked, glancing at me.
I tried to remain calm. “I’m not sure what happened. She’ll tell me once she’s done,” I replied.
“Oh, it was her shorts. They were too short,” she divulged.
I was taken aback. Apparently, an eighth-grade teacher had deemed them inappropriate and sent her to the principal’s office. My inner feminist was fuming, but I kept quiet. It felt absurd that while I was raising my daughter to embrace her body, the school was enforcing a dress code that seemed more like a “slut index” than a set of guidelines for appropriate attire.
The secretary expressed her own frustrations, suggesting that if there were so many rules, why not just implement uniforms? I understood her sentiment but knew that wasn’t the heart of the issue. Then she dropped another bombshell: leggings were also banned.
“That’s not in the handbook,” I protested, recalling my careful reading of it.
I refrained from sharing my less-than-pleasant habit of combing through school policies to feel outraged. I knew for a fact that the shorts Lily wore ended well below her fingertips, yet here we were.
“Well, it’s a rule. No leggings unless they’re paired with a dress or shorts,” she explained. “They’re deemed tights.”
I felt a wave of frustration wash over me. How can leggings not be considered pants? I wanted to express that leggings serve as a body equalizer for girls of all shapes and sizes, and they also promote socioeconomic equality. It’s disheartening that middle school begins to define a girl’s worth based on how others perceive her body.
This is not new information, but it’s a harsh reality for the young girls navigating their adolescence. They’re taught that their bodies are not their own and that they must conform to the comfort levels of others, particularly boys. The unspoken message is clear: girls must shoulder the burden of how they are perceived.
On that day, it didn’t matter that Lily felt comfortable and confident. An arbitrary rule overshadowed her joy, and instead of focusing on education, the school sent a message about compliance and body shame. For further insights on this topic, visit this blog post which discusses similar themes in the context of self-identity.
In summary, dress codes often perpetuate unhealthy messages regarding body image, particularly for young girls. It’s crucial for us as parents to challenge these norms and encourage our daughters to find value in themselves, irrespective of societal expectations.