About a year after I tied the knot with my partner, we decided to stop using contraception and see where life would take us. At the ages of 24 and 25, we felt prepared to embark on the family journey, ready to embrace the changes that lay ahead. Although I cherish my children immensely, I often think back to my younger self and wish I could share some wisdom with her. If I had the chance to rewind the clock, here are ten things I would prioritize before becoming a parent:
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Eliminate My Student Debt
I graduated with a significant amount of student loans, and here I am nearly 20 years later still making payments. In hindsight, I wish we had delayed starting a family by a year or two, living off my partner’s salary while using my income solely to tackle that debt. -
Travel More
It’s a common sentiment, but it rings true. I had the opportunity to live in Japan for almost a year after college, which I’m incredibly grateful for. However, I wish I had explored more destinations, both solo and with my partner, before kids entered the picture. I’ve since discovered countless budget-friendly travel hacks that would have made early adventures even more enjoyable. -
Pursue a Higher Degree
Time and again, I’ve contemplated whether I should have sought a Master’s or Ph.D. While some moms manage to pursue advanced degrees post-kids—kudos to them!—I couldn’t envision myself doing that during my children’s early years, and as they grow older, my motivation to return to school has diminished. -
Explore Museums at My Own Pace
We’ve spent countless hours in museums with our kids, but it often feels like a rushed visit rather than a thorough exploration. I long for the days when I could stroll leisurely through exhibits, soaking in all the information without a child tugging at my sleeve or racing off to the next display. -
Attend More Live Events
It wasn’t until I had young children that I truly appreciated the joy of live performances. From symphonies to theater, I took for granted the experiences that are often disrupted by little ones. -
Value My Sleep
This point is self-explanatory, as every parent knows the struggle with sleep. Even on nights when I do manage to rest well, it never quite compares to the deep, restorative sleep I enjoyed before becoming a parent. -
Master Time Management
I didn’t fully grasp the significance of effective time management until I juggled multiple jobs, a partner, three kids, and community obligations. Ironically, my busy schedule now leaves little room for diving into time management strategies. -
Get Fit
I’ve always had an inconsistent relationship with exercise, but if I had known the challenges of maintaining fitness post-kids, I would have seized my younger years to get in shape. It would have been beneficial to enter motherhood with a solid health routine rather than attempting to create one later. -
Maintain a Diary
While I’ve started a few journals, I regret not keeping a consistent record of my thoughts and experiences prior to motherhood. It would be fascinating to reflect on how I’ve grown and changed over the years, especially since I often feel like I’ve lost touch with my younger self. -
Cherish My Alone Time
During the year before I became pregnant, my partner and I spent nearly all our time together. Since then, having children means I rarely enjoy solitary moments. Being an introvert, I’ve come to miss that alone time, and I wish I had appreciated it more while it lasted.
As I reflect on these experiences, I ponder whether I would truly change anything if given the chance. After all, hindsight is 20/20, and it’s likely that financial circumstances would have impacted many of these choices. Nonetheless, it’s intriguing to consider what I might have done differently with the knowledge I have now.
Ultimately, however, it’s essential to focus on the future. What will I wish I had done by the time I’m in my 60s or 70s? It’s a reminder to make the most of the present while my kids are still at home.
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