Dear Family,
We cherish you and hold your presence dear in our lives and the lives of our children. Your involvement matters to us, and we look forward to creating lasting connections between you and our little ones. However, to ensure our interactions are positive, we’d like to establish some guidelines. These aren’t meant to be burdensome rules, nor are they criticisms of past behaviors. Instead, they are proactive steps to foster a healthy relationship.
DO NOT pressure our kids into physical affection.
Forcing them to hug or kiss you, or making them feel guilty for not doing so, is counterproductive. While you may associate hugs with warmth and affection, our children, especially if they don’t see you often, might not feel the same way. We’re teaching them about personal boundaries and bodily autonomy, which is crucial for their development and safety. A simple high-five or friendly wave can be just as meaningful.
DO consider experiences over material gifts.
We appreciate your thoughtfulness when it comes to presents, but we encourage gifts that create memories, like passes to local attractions or activities. While toys and books are wonderful, we kindly ask that you refrain from excessive gifting, particularly of plastic items that clutter our home.
DO take one child out for special outings.
A trip to the ice cream shop or a visit to the park can create cherished memories for both you and the child. These one-on-one experiences help strengthen your bond and can spark healthy sibling envy!
DO engage with their interests beyond basic questions.
Instead of just asking, “How’s school?” delve into what excites them. Whether it’s their favorite show or a new Lego set, showing genuine interest will leave a lasting impression. Your involvement in their passions—like playing with their toys or sharing in their activities—will enhance your relationship significantly.
DO NOT contradict our parenting in front of the kids.
If we say it’s bedtime, please support that decision rather than suggesting they can stay up longer. This not only undermines our authority but can lead to confusion and misbehavior. If you have concerns, approach us privately so we can discuss it without putting the child in the middle.
DO support our parenting choices publicly.
When we set boundaries, feel free to reinforce them. If we ask a child to stop a behavior, your agreement can help solidify the message. However, please wait to address any misbehavior until we are together, as it can be embarrassing for us to feel undermined.
DO discipline in a way that aligns with our methods.
If you’re aware of how we handle certain behaviors, please stick to those methods. For instance, if we prefer talking through issues rather than physical punishment, we ask that you mirror that approach—this helps maintain consistency for the children.
DO remember they are kids, and temper your expectations.
Children will be children, which means they may act out during waits or become overly excited. It’s normal for them to express their energy in unexpected ways. Understanding this helps create a supportive environment rather than one filled with undue stress.
By following these guidelines, we can cultivate a positive atmosphere for everyone involved. We genuinely appreciate your support and love, and we are excited to create wonderful memories together.
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In summary, our aim is to foster healthy relationships among our family members, ensuring that everyone feels valued and respected.