As I navigate my 40s, I find myself reflecting on the cultural narrative surrounding women in this age group who are said to be indifferent to societal expectations. While I appreciate this newfound freedom from the insecurities that plagued my younger years, I must admit that I genuinely care about certain things—deeply.
I admire my fellow women in their 40s who embrace their identities, confidently sidestepping judgments about our comfortable yoga pants or skin-hugging jeans. We’ve learned to prioritize self-acceptance over societal pressures, recognizing the importance of our parenting decisions, even if we attend fewer school events or skip the makeup. We’ve let go of toxic relationships and learned to love our bodies, whether they have softened post-baby or retained their youthful tone. But now what?
Shedding unnecessary worries has been liberating. It has opened up mental and emotional space for what truly matters. Here’s where I’m choosing to invest my energy.
Making a Positive Impact
I know this may sound cliché, but it’s a reality I’m embracing. In my 20s and 30s, I nurtured lofty dreams of changing the world. I volunteered, raised funds for various causes, and believed that the world’s problems would be addressed. Yet, motherhood—especially raising three daughters—shifted my perspective. Issues like education, healthcare, and women’s rights became personal. As my girls prepare to forge their paths, my concern for their future intensifies. I’m more committed than ever to advocate against gun violence, sexual assault, and systemic racism. I refuse to be silenced by those who disagree; I will proudly voice my beliefs.
Prioritizing My Health
For years, I focused on my body’s appearance, but my 40s have prompted a shift towards valuing its function. To me, health has become the new skinny; strength is more important than fitting into a size 2. I prioritize sleep, exercise, and nutrition, all while still enjoying life’s little pleasures like cocktails and chocolate. At this stage, I’m less concerned about the numbers on the scale.
Nurturing Meaningful Relationships
I am actively working on recognizing relationships that no longer serve me and letting them fade away. If it means having a smaller circle of friends, I’m okay with that. I’m dedicated to enhancing the connections that matter most, particularly as my eldest daughter transitions to high school. I want her to truly know me and for me to know her. In just a few years, I’ll be focusing on my marriage, which is an ongoing journey, and nurturing relationships with family and close friends.
Taking Charge of My Life
As my children gain independence, I’m now focusing on my own needs and desires. It’s time to reevaluate the commitments I’ve made that no longer bring fulfillment. I’m considering full-time work again or even diving deeper into my passion for surfing. This is a moment for self-discovery and prioritizing what truly matters in my life.
Embracing My Authentic Self
For too long, I denied parts of my identity, fearing they were unacceptable. Each of us is flawed, and it’s okay. I’ve come to accept my quirks—my anxiety, my passion, and my need for solitude. My friends and family appreciate me just as I am. Realizing I no longer care about certain people and situations has been liberating, and I’m excited to determine what truly matters to me and how to pursue it.
What will you do with your remaining energy and focus?
For more insights on navigating life transitions, check out one of our other articles here. If you’re interested in home insemination, Cryobaby offers excellent resources. The NHS also provides valuable information on intrauterine insemination, a fantastic resource for those exploring pregnancy options.
In summary, my 40s are about embracing who I am, prioritizing what matters, and courageously stepping away from what doesn’t. It’s a time for growth, self-acceptance, and making impactful changes in my life and the world around me.