A man’s tale of cleaning up after his Roomba rolled through a pile of dog poop in his home has gone viral, and it’s more entertaining than a comedy show.
“Last week, an unfortunate event unfolded in our household, and it took me a while to gather my thoughts and articulate the sheer horror of the situation,” begins this wild story involving a malfunctioning cleaning device that’s captured the internet’s attention for all the right reasons.
Who wouldn’t want a Roomba? This robotic vacuum effortlessly glides across your floors, maneuvering around furniture, reaching into corners, and tackling area rugs with ease—all while remaining relatively quiet. Many people set it to clean at night, only to wake up to sparkling floors. Sounds perfect, right?
That is, unless a fresh pile of dog poop sits right in its path. Enter Alex Johnson, who humorously describes the chaos that ensues when a Roomba encounters dog waste.
He refers to the incident with a few creative names: “The Poopocalypse,” “The Pooptastrophe,” and “The Pooppening.”
“If you own a Roomba, focus your attention on what I’m about to share,” Alex cautions. “Under no circumstances should you allow your Roomba to run over dog poop… because if it does, that poop will spread across every surface it reaches, resulting in a home that resembles a Jackson Pollock painting—only it’s made of dog waste.”
His Roomba had a run-in with a fresh pile at 1:30 AM while everyone else in the house was asleep. When his five-year-old woke up and crawled into bed at 3:00 AM, Alex was alerted to the disaster:
“When your little one comes to snuggle at 3 AM smelling like dog poop, you know something’s amiss. You step into the living room and immediately notice the floor feels gritty beneath your feet. Then you spot a brown, oddly Roomba-shaped object in the middle of the room, glowing green as if everything is just fine. At this point, you’re still half-asleep, but that changes in an instant.”
“And then the horror. Oh, the horror.”
Let’s take a moment to acknowledge the sheer magnitude of this situation. Anyone who has a dog knows that even a tiny bit of poop can emit a foul odor. Now, picture that mess spread throughout your entire home.
Naturally, Alex decides to clean up his child first. “You wash the poop off his feet and tuck him back into bed. But your own feet? Nah, you know what’s coming, and it’s inevitable,” he chuckles. “Some people might just crawl back into bed and deal with it later, but not you—not when there’s a poop disaster in your living room.”
Truth be told, no one would sensibly ignore that situation.
“So, you tackle the Roomba next. You toss it into the bathtub, letting it soak while you disassemble it piece by piece, wondering when you became an adult responsible for a 3:30 AM Roomba poop cleanup. Before you know it, poop is smeared up to your elbows. You hear that ominous ‘whirrrrrrr-boop-hissssss’ noise, indicating that something has gone terribly wrong, and you realize you forgot to remove the battery before getting it wet.”
Yes, Alex dropped an entire electronic device into the bathtub.
“Your language would make even the devil cringe,” he laughs. “You hope your child sleeps soundly because if he hears you now, you might as well be sending him straight to prison.”
But the chaos doesn’t stop there. “Next, you grab the carpet shampooer. When you approach the rug—the one that started this whole mess—the shampooer laughs at you, because, let’s face it, that rug is trash now. But you clean it anyway; your spouse adored that rug, and you know she’ll ask if you put in the effort.”
And that’s not the end of the story. It involves countless paper towels, a steam mop, and even a toothbrush—though for the full rollercoaster of events, you’ll want to read the complete account.
The silver lining? Roomba recognized the “Pooptastrophe” as a valid reason for a full replacement of the $400 device that Alex had unceremoniously tossed into the tub.
“I told them the truth,” Alex said. “My Roomba encountered dog poop and nearly triggered World War III.”
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Summary:
This humorous account of a Roomba’s unfortunate encounter with dog poop reveals the chaos that ensues during a late-night cleaning disaster. The story provides a lighthearted look at parenting challenges and the unexpected responsibilities that come with owning a robotic vacuum cleaner.