I will candidly confess — I judge everyone I encounter. There, I’ve said it. If you’ve shared a conversation with me at a social gathering, I’ve assessed your actions. If our paths have crossed online, whether for professional purposes or casual interactions, I’ve evaluated your responses. Even strangers don’t escape my scrutiny — whether at the grocery store, Target, or while navigating traffic. I’m constantly observing those around me, passing judgment.
Some may label me as excessively critical, but that’s not entirely accurate. My judgments aren’t directed at individuals for their choices or everyday actions. Instead, I focus on those who contribute to a more hostile and unkind world by unfairly criticizing others simply trying to navigate their lives. Whether it’s a parent grappling with a challenging child, a same-sex couple striving for the right to marry, or anyone expressing their political views, if you choose to judge them harshly, I will respond with my own judgment of your callousness.
I’m aware of the contradiction here. The rise of the internet and social media has stripped away the nuances of judging in person or discussing individuals behind closed doors. Nowadays, we can express our opinions while cloaked in anonymity, tearing others down without facing the consequences. The instant gratification found in a tweet or a comment has led to a culture ready to attack at a moment’s notice.
In an instant, a person can be condemned in the court of public opinion before their full story is known. When I witness such behavior, whether from acquaintances or strangers online, I feel compelled to defend those unjustly criticized. Take, for instance, the mother who faced unimaginable horror when her child was accidentally harmed at a zoo. Almost immediately, online critics descended upon her, ready to vilify a parent who had just endured a nightmare. Similarly, the parents who suffered the loss of their child to an alligator while on vacation were met with brutal judgment instead of compassion.
When did society choose to react with cruelty in the face of another’s tragedy? This is why I judge — and I do so passionately.
In these situations, I felt deep empathy for those grieving parents. Every day, I find myself hoping I won’t become the subject of some viral parenting fail. Whether pulling out of a parking spot or dining out with my children, I constantly worry about mishaps. Those parents didn’t wake up intending to harm their children; they simply loved them enough to enjoy a day out together. While I hope they find healing, I also feel sorry for the individuals who resort to online negativity — they will likely remain forever bitter.
So, yes, I judge based on how people treat one another. A person’s character often reveals itself through their manners, grace, and kindness, especially in tough situations. We all have bad days where our frustrations can spill over, and I understand that. However, if someone routinely spews hate toward others or judges lifestyles they don’t understand, I will judge them right back. In my eyes, they’re guilty without the chance of a trial.
Parenting is tough. Life itself is challenging. Everyone faces their own battles, but personal struggles don’t give anyone a free pass to be mean. We are often our harshest critics, and being judgmental only makes you appear sanctimonious. So, let’s all pause before we type. Consider stepping into someone else’s shoes instead of joining the angry mob online. Or, why not engage in a real conversation with someone face-to-face instead? Save the judgment for the truly deserving, like the orange figure running for president, and let’s support well-meaning individuals who are doing their best.
You may have heard the saying, “Judge not, lest ye be judged.” Perhaps it should be revised to “Just be kind and avoid being an ass.” The world would undoubtedly be a better place.
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In conclusion, while I do judge, it’s driven by a desire to protect those who are unfairly criticized. Let’s strive for compassion and understanding in our interactions with others.