As a parent, I adore my kids, but like many, I find myself frustrated with them at times. It’s completely natural for parents to express their grievances—it’s a way to maintain our sanity. I often find myself sharing my struggles with friends or family, saying things like, “I just want to eat a meal without interruptions!” or “Can I please have a moment to myself in the bathroom?” or “Why does it feel impossible to get anything done around here?”
Usually, the comforting response is: “I totally understand. You’re not alone; this phase will pass.” However, there are moments when someone suggests, “Just let them play! Teach them to entertain themselves!” While I know their intentions aren’t malicious, my reaction is often, “You just don’t get it!”
Perhaps there’s something unique about my children or my parenting style. Who knows? But in my experience, my kids don’t really “entertain themselves,” unless you count the hours they spend glued to their devices. They are active players, sure, but if I leave them to their own devices, my house might end up looking like a tornado hit, not to mention the potential for a trip to the emergency room.
I have two boys: a 3-year-old and a 9-year-old. My youngest can occasionally engage in solo play—if the stars align and he’s feeling cooperative, he might spend 20 or 30 minutes lost in a world of superheroes. But when he’s in a cranky mood or if his older brother is around, forget it.
On average, I manage to get about an hour of independent playtime from him each week. That’s just enough time to unload the dishwasher. If I ever make the mistake of answering a phone call or hopping in the shower, he’ll demand my attention immediately. However, if I stand by him doing dishes, I can sometimes sneak in a moment of peace.
Now, my older son is a different story altogether. He’s incredibly bright and full of energy, always seeking stimulation. He might sit with a book or a video game, but if those options are off the table, there’s a lot of whining. He also loves to chat—constantly. The noise level in our home is never-ending. I’ve become so accustomed to their constant chatter that when the house is finally quiet, it feels surreal. I’ll just close my eyes and savor the silence when it happens.
As for their playtime together, it’s a mixed bag. They genuinely love each other and do play together often, but it usually requires a lot of my oversight. Their fun quickly devolves into fighting, with about five minutes of enjoyment followed by five minutes of bickering—on repeat.
I genuinely try to give them space to resolve their arguments and figure things out on their own, but that doesn’t mean I can actually get anything done. It’s possible my kids need more attention than others, or maybe I’m just too anxious about things going awry to give them the freedom they need. Regardless, I think it’s safe to say that most kids in their early years demand a lot of parental involvement, leaving us parents feeling drained.
Despite the chaos, I know my boys are bright and will thrive. Even though they drive me up the wall at times, I also recognize that one day, I’ll miss this craziness. I long for moments of solitude to complete simple tasks without little hands reaching out for me.
Ultimately, I remind myself that this phase will pass, and it’s all part of the journey. But seriously, can a mom get a moment of peace to herself?
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Summary
Parenting two boys can be overwhelming, especially when they struggle to entertain themselves without constant supervision. While I cherish my children, I long for moments of peace to complete everyday tasks. Recognizing that this phase won’t last forever helps me cope, but the chaos can be exhausting.