“Mom, what’s prawnstitution?”
And just like that, a pivotal conversation about sex began, all thanks to an episode of Futurama. At the time, my son was only 10, and prior to this, he had sidestepped any discussions that involved explicit content. I still remember the time he asked my husband why Noah needed two of each animal on the ark. After hearing that it was to ensure the survival of the species, he promptly declared, “I’m sure I don’t want to hear the rest of this…”
So there we were, sharing a mother-son moment in front of the TV (where many bonding experiences happen), and I knew I had to take advantage of this opportunity. Who knows what they’re teaching in health class these days? I wanted to make sure I was ahead of the curve.
“Well, a prawn is like a big shrimp. And prostitution is when people—usually women, but not always—engage in sex for money, not because they have feelings for the person.”
He contemplated this, and I encouraged him to ask any other questions he had about sex.
“Well, Liam—” I’m using a fictional name since my son has no friends named Liam— “said something wild. He said that a penis gets really big and then goes INSIDE a vagina.”
Liam seems to know a thing or two. I confirmed that he was correct about the basic anatomy involved.
“Really!” he exclaimed, as if someone dim-witted had just won a prestigious award.
With more questions on the horizon, I realized that the traditional “birds and the bees” talk is often assigned to fathers for sons and mothers for daughters, but I wasn’t about to run around looking for my husband. We were having a great moment, and I decided to keep the conversation flowing.
I wanted him to feel comfortable discussing any confusion he might have. I explained that it’s completely normal for a boy his age to think about sex—whether he’s curious or indifferent. There’s no “wrong” way to feel about it at ten, and I wanted him to understand that. I also touched on the unexpected physical reactions boys can experience, whether it’s triggered by seeing a pretty girl or even just random thoughts. Dreams were part of that normalcy too.
“Well, that’s a relief,” he said, appearing pleased but not fully meeting my gaze. We continued watching Futurama, with Zoidberg’s antics on screen providing a backdrop to our conversation.
“So how often do people have sex?” he asked after a moment of silence.
That’s a great question—one without a straightforward answer. I explained that it varies from person to person, carefully avoiding a deeper dive into the nuances of long-term relationships or the intensity of new love.
“So, do you and Dad have sex?”
“Um, yes. Yes we do.”
“How often?”
It would’ve been easy to dismiss him with a “none of your business” response. While discussing sex in abstract terms is comfortable for me, diving into my personal life is another story—especially with family.
“Well, um, pretty often. You know, sometimes.”
“Like… when was the last time?”
Oh boy. But he wasn’t prying out of nosiness; he was searching for context. I recalled my own childhood curiosity about periods, wanting to know exactly what to expect.
“A couple of days ago,” I replied.
“Really!” he said, surprised by my openness.
I turned the conversation back to him, and we shared a quiet moment.
“You can always talk to Dad about this stuff too.”
“I think I’m comfortable talking to you.”
“Okay.”
“Can we go back to watching Futurama now?”
“Sure.”
And just like that, the Big Talk about sex had happened.
Reflecting back on my own upbringing in the ’70s, I remember a controversial book called Show Me, which aimed to educate kids about sex but ended up being quite shocking. Banned in many areas for being too explicit, it left a lasting impression on me. When I nervously asked my mother about when I would have to have sex, she reassured me that it wouldn’t happen until I truly wanted it to. “Good!” I responded. “Then I’m never going to.”
Times have certainly changed. Now, I strive to balance conveying that sex is a normal and wonderful part of life while also reassuring my kids that they don’t need to worry about it for quite some time. In the back of my mind, I can’t help but wonder if they’re asking others or if their curiosity, sparked by Futurama, will lead them down a path of confusion.
For now, we’re just figuring it out as we go along. If you’re interested in more insights into family discussions about sexual health, check out this post. Additionally, if you’re considering at-home insemination options, Cryobaby offers reputable kits for your needs. For further information on pregnancy and insemination, visit NHS.
In summary, engaging in open conversations about sex with our children can be daunting but also essential for their understanding of such topics.
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