You may think you know me. Perhaps you’ve spotted me at the playground—I’m the mom sitting on the bench, engrossed in my phone while my kids swing and climb. Or maybe you’ve seen me at the supermarket, tapping away on my screen while my children plead for my attention. I’m the woman who juggles serving food at a restaurant with one hand while scrolling through my device with the other. You probably label me as “that” mom—the one who seems more focused on her phone than on her kids.
You might question what kind of mother prioritizes her phone over valuable moments with her children. You could assume that I’m aloof, distracted, and unable to pull myself away from my screen to engage with my little ones. But here’s the truth that remains unseen.
When you see me at the park, that’s my moment of respite. You see, I homeschool my children. I spend all day with them, actively engaging, playing, and learning together. The park is a rare opportunity where I know my kids are happily occupied and require little from me. It’s a chance for me to unwind, catch up with friends, or handle some work-related tasks.
Speaking of work, I haven’t mentioned that I also work from home. I’m a writer, and my job allows me to balance my passion with homeschooling. However, this arrangement means sometimes I need to proofread documents while my kids enjoy the playground. Other times, I have to respond to emails in the checkout line, tuning out their requests for things I’ve already declined. Occasionally, an idea for an article strikes me during my child’s karate class, prompting me to quickly jot down my thoughts on my phone.
But there’s more to it. As you can imagine, balancing homeschooling and work can make it challenging to find time for adult interactions. When you see me on my phone, I might be connecting with old friends on Facebook because keeping relationships alive is important. I could be texting my partner because our relationship matters just as much as our children do. Perhaps I’m planning a visit to see my grandmother, who is 90, and I want to cherish the time we have together. I might even be having a lighthearted conversation with my best friend through Bitmojis—those quick exchanges help alleviate the stress of my busy life.
My chosen lifestyle demands a certain level of organization too. While at the park, I might be searching for tips on managing my time better. At the grocery store, I could be looking up quick and healthy dinner recipes, trying to streamline our meals. When dining out, I might be checking my calendar to schedule individual outings with each of my kids, because even though we’re together daily, one-on-one time is rare.
Some days, I might review our finances, research fun field trip ideas for the kids, or indulge in a book on my Kindle app while they’re occupied. Essentially, my phone allows me to maintain my work-life balance while being present for my children. If I were to commit to never using my phone around them, I’d miss out on the very work that enables me to stay home and educate them.
Yes, you may have witnessed me tapping away on my phone, perhaps shaking your head at what appears to be misplaced priorities. In those moments, I might have been engrossed in my device, but you don’t know the full story. Maybe that mom has just spent four hours engaged with her children. Maybe she’s managing necessary tasks to afford the privilege of being at home. Maybe she’s prioritizing self-care, which is something we often overlook.
So next time you see me on my phone, please don’t judge my parenting. It’s all good. I’m not a detached mother, and my children are not lacking my attention. They get more than enough of me—including those much-needed breaks we both appreciate.
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Summary
This piece highlights the often-overlooked realities of a busy mom balancing homeschooling and work. It emphasizes the importance of self-care, adult interactions, and the realities of modern parenting, encouraging readers to reconsider their judgments about mothers on their phones.