You Know You’re Pregnant When…

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Pregnancy is a unique journey, and there are moments that make it all too clear you’re expecting. Here’s a light-hearted look at the signs that scream, “You’re pregnant!”

  1. You find yourself asking your partner at least three times a day if you’re starting to look too hefty.
  2. You feel a surge of irritation when your partner innocently suggests you might be gaining weight.
  3. You arrive at work only to have your assistant discreetly inform you that your shoes are mismatched.
  4. You start eyeing strollers on the sidewalk with the same enthusiasm you once reserved for attractive strangers.
  5. Your Google searches are filled with “pregnancy” and “is this normal?” as you try to navigate the ups and downs of your condition.
  6. You become oddly fixated on the color of your discharge as if it were a vital clue.
  7. You whip up a pot of spaghetti at 8 a.m., and it feels completely normal.
  8. You catch yourself wondering if Dunkin’ Donuts has a loyalty program.
  9. You realize you just got up to pee, yet here you are, needing to go again.
  10. You save your favorite outfit and best undies for those all-important OB appointments.
  11. You now know the location of every bathroom in every place you’ve ever visited.
  12. You’ve reached a point where flip-flops are your go-to footwear, even for client meetings and church.
  13. You look down in the shower and realize you can’t see your vagina, prompting a mirror check just to confirm it’s still there.
  14. You have to gently coax your tender breasts out of your bra instead of just taking it off.
  15. Your dog eyes you with a look that seems to say, “Wow, you’ve really let yourself go.”
  16. If one more person tells you to “get your sleep while you can,” you might just lose it.
  17. Your desire for sleep far outweighs any cravings for food or intimacy.
  18. You request a recliner to swap with your office chair because it’s just too uncomfortable to sit.
  19. You struggle to keep your eyes open at work, and your partner doesn’t seem to be bothered by it at all.
  20. The thought of intimacy seems daunting because everything feels so swollen.
  21. You find yourself pleading with your partner for intimacy, hoping it might trigger labor, then immediately apologize for making him be with a whale.

If these resonate with you, you’re likely knee-deep in the beautiful chaos of pregnancy. For more insights on pregnancy milestones that aren’t always in the books, check out this informative blog post.

And if you’re exploring your options for at-home insemination, Make A Mom offers a fantastic selection of insemination kits. Plus, for a wealth of knowledge on pregnancy and home insemination, visit The Center, which is an excellent resource.

In summary, pregnancy is filled with hilarious and relatable moments that highlight the changes happening to your body and lifestyle. Embrace the journey, and remember, you’re not alone in this wild ride!


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