Running errands for my mom? Easy. Packing five friends into the car for a spontaneous outing? No sweat. Late-night drives to grab some late-night chow? Who can resist a beef chow fun run at three in the morning? When I first made the leap to Manhattan, I held onto my car, maneuvering it between the streets to avoid parking tickets and the occasional break-in. Whether in the city or the countryside, rain or shine, every weekend was an excuse for a road trip to go apple picking or to fetch friends from afar. What’s a minor fender bender when there’s a concert to attend across the state?
But then, I transitioned to the suburbs. A place where driving to your mailbox is a common routine. Where you hop in the car just to hit the gym, only to walk on a treadmill. Where a quick trip for sugar isn’t a stroll next door but a ten-minute drive to the store. Suddenly, the mileage on my car—and my life—seemed to accumulate at an alarming rate.
Initially, the picturesque tree-lined streets and speed bumps appeared charming. That is until you find yourself bouncing over those bumps multiple times a day. Picking up the kids, dropping them off at school, shuttling them to soccer practice, and back again.
“Dad, can you pick me up at 5 from practice, then drop Julie off? Oh, and I need some index cards from Staples. Can we get Panera for dinner? Frontega Chicken, please!”
“Dad, after you pick me up on Main Street, could you drop me off at Lisa’s? Then, come back in two hours so we can hit the gym? Oh, and can Deanna tag along? She’ll be waiting at her house.”
“Dad, I left my sweater at Lindsey’s. Can you grab it on your way back from Home Depot? Also, Mom’s making salmon. Can you swing by Panera? You know I hate salmon! Love you!”
Wait, what?
It’s a never-ending cycle of driving…and that’s just for one kid! Multiply that by two, three, or four kids, and you’ll see parents waving from opposite sides of the street. Forget about cozy evenings on the couch; Mom and Dad have transformed into road warriors, navigating life’s challenges while ferrying their pre-teens.
I take pride in being a dedicated dad, but when did I unwittingly become “Uber Dad”? Was it a checkbox on my child’s birth certificate, agreeing to be just a text away at every moment? Always in motion, transporting my kids from one place to another, offering complimentary door-to-door service for teens.
Uber Dad? More like Uber-schmuck (or, let’s think positively—Uber-mensch). With music, news, and constant conversations within their texting reach, why not have Dad and Mom on speed dial? Instant gratification means Dad can swoop in at a moment’s notice. Forget conference calls; you can tackle those from the front seat as you rush to school pickup. It’s multitasking at its finest for suburban parents.
And I have to own it. I chose to raise my kids where sidewalks are scarce. I craved trees, grass, acreage, and fresh air—my overpriced little piece of paradise.
No more endless honking unless it’s a gaggle of geese. Instead, I have the freedom of open roads and roadside vegetable stands. But in escaping the city’s congestion, I found myself at the gas station more often than I expected.
I’ve inadvertently taught my kids that every road begins and ends at our home. No distance is too far, no outing too tiring. Weekend tournaments? Just a hop, skip, and jump down the Interstate. Friday night movies? Who needs the theater when Netflix is just a click away?
It’s constant juggling: figuring out which parents are dropping off and which are picking up. Instead of enjoying sushi with lifelong friends, you’re negotiating with another parent about logistics. Dylan’s dad gets more of your time than your own father.
And let’s not even get started on those parents who make a quick getaway whenever it’s their turn to join the suburban carpool. They drop their kids off at your house without a sound, eager to escape to the local wine bar instead of shepherding the kids around. “Haley’s mom can’t drive.” “Haley’s dad is out of town.” “Haley’s nanny is off on Wednesdays.”
Why should they be available, especially when Uber Dad is on the way?
If you’re interested in further exploring parenting and family dynamics, check out this insightful post on Cervical Insemination for more stories. If you’re considering home insemination, Make a Mom offers reputable at-home insemination syringe kits to help you on your journey. Additionally, for excellent resources on pregnancy and home insemination, visit CDC’s site.
In summary, moving to the suburbs brings a whirlwind of changes—especially for parents who suddenly find themselves in a perpetual state of driving, fulfilling the role of “Uber Dad.” While the serene setting may initially seem appealing, the reality of constant transportation can feel overwhelming.
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