I’ve got curves, a C-section scar, and let’s be honest, my abs have been MIA since 2002. My thighs bear stretch marks, and I often wonder why they keep appearing. My legs could be mistaken for tree trunks, and my rear end? Let’s just say it has a presence all its own. At this moment, I carry an extra 20 pounds, and while my children are now 10 and 12, I still cling to the hope of shedding that baby weight. Yes, I’m aware of the timeline—let a girl dream!
No amount of airbrushing or clever lighting can recreate the toned midsection I had in my twenties. On an average day, my bras are fortified with enough underwire to support a small structure, and my underwear is less “lacy” and more “industrial strength.” Zippers make me anxious, and I’ve long since accepted that my pre-kids wardrobe is a thing of the past.
Yet, I still choose to wear a bikini.
After my son was born, I went through the ritual of finding the “ideal mom bathing suit.” I scoured stores for a sleek black suit that offered padding, coverage, and support, all while somehow making me appear 30 pounds lighter. It had to include ruching (whatever that is) to hide the signs of motherhood. The perfect swimsuit would have a skirt and a tank top, long enough to mask the fact that my bikini waxes were more infrequent than I’d like.
But by the time I found something that fit the bill, I resembled a 90-year-old woman from a conservative community. I realized that it wasn’t worth my time to stress over what I should wear to the pool. I love bikinis, and I wear them—without shame. And I think you should, too.
My body has nurtured two children for ten months each. I’ve completed six marathons. I’ve fed two babies with milk produced by breasts that grew to extraordinary sizes. My partner finds me attractive more times than I can count, and honestly, at 40, I’m past the point of worrying about others’ opinions.
I refuse to cover up my stretch marks. I’m fine with my soft, marshmallow-like stomach. And if you notice my nipples making an appearance, perhaps you’re spending too much time staring at my chest at the pool (seriously, dude, snap a photo—it lasts longer).
Media outlets bombard us with messages of body positivity while simultaneously showcasing celebrities in airbrushed swimsuits. As soon as summer hits, our feeds are filled with tips on how to look our best and ads for suits that promise to magically shave off pounds. Frankly, I’m over it.
Why not just wear what we feel comfortable in and enjoy our time at the pool? I admire the woman who strolls to the snack stand in her bikini, jiggly thighs and all, far more than the one with washboard abs. I appreciate the mom who reveals her body with confidence instead of hiding behind layers.
Those who embrace their “flaws” in a world obsessed with unrealistic beauty standards are the ones I want alongside me. Together, we can declare, “This is who I am. If you don’t like it, there’s a perfectly sculpted doll in the deep end you can gaze at instead.”
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ll be applying sunscreen to my pale skin while I settle into my beach chair, watching my kids have fun in the pool. Oh, and by the way, if you happen to know what ruching is, please keep it to yourself. My body is perfectly fine enjoying the sun as it is.
For more information about body positivity and self-acceptance, check out this privacy policy. And for those interested in the journey of motherhood, Make a Mom is a fantastic resource. Additionally, if you’re looking to explore fertility options, Medical News Today provides excellent insights.
Summary:
This article discusses body positivity, self-acceptance, and the importance of wearing what makes you comfortable, regardless of societal pressures. The author shares personal experiences with body image after motherhood, advocating for women to embrace their bodies as they are, especially when it comes to swimwear choices.