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I won’t say, “I’ve been through that.”
As a physician who has seen countless parents struggling, I understand how unhelpful it is to hear someone dismiss your feelings with “I’ve been through that.” It can feel frustrating when you’re in the midst of chaos, like that time I witnessed a parent juggling three kids crying in a grocery store. Just because I’ve experienced similar challenges doesn’t mean my words will ease your current distress. I promise to hold back on such phrases and simply listen to you instead. -
I won’t offer unsolicited advice.
I recognize that every new parent has their unique journey. Therefore, I won’t bombard you with articles or tips unless you specifically ask for them. You may feel exhausted and overwhelmed, but that doesn’t mean you need another parenting book on sleep techniques. If you’re sharing your struggles, I’ll be there to listen, not to lecture. -
I won’t compete with your stories.
If you’re venting about a tough day, I won’t share my own horror stories of sleepless nights and tantrums. Hearing about someone else’s woes doesn’t make your experience any easier. In fact, it might lead to feelings of frustration rather than comfort. I promise to validate your feelings instead of trying to one-up your challenges. -
I won’t point out what your child is missing.
If your toddler is running around without shoes or is clearly tired, I won’t be the one to state the obvious. You’re doing your best, and I trust you are aware of your child’s needs. However, if I see a situation that could lead to a mess—like a child with hands in their diaper—I will step in, as I know how hectic parenting can get. -
I won’t tell you to cherish every moment.
Let’s be honest; some moments are simply not cherishable, like when your child mistakes your shoulder for a chew toy. I won’t pressure you to feel guilty for not savoring those chaotic experiences. Parenting is filled with ups and downs, and it’s okay to acknowledge that not every moment is picture-perfect.
These are my heartfelt vows to you, the moms who are navigating this wild journey. You have my support as you embrace both the good and the challenging. For more insights on pregnancy and parenting, consider checking out March of Dimes for valuable resources.
Best wishes,
Dr. Emily Carter
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Summary:
This article outlines five promises from a doctor to future mothers, emphasizing empathy, support, and understanding without the pressure of unsolicited advice or the expectation to cherish every moment.