As parents, we often find ourselves wishing our toddlers could take a moment to reflect on their habits and set some resolutions for the new year. Here’s a humorous take on what those resolutions might look like from a toddler’s perspective.
- Prioritize sleep and minimize couch nose-wiping.
- Organize toys; let the era of Chaos Bins come to an end!
- Accept that knives, pens, and loose change are not appropriate playthings at this stage.
- Foster better relationships by being kinder to familiar faces and perhaps a bit more reserved with strangers.
- Aim to reduce my public restroom touch radius—less is more, right?
- Move on from my complicated relationship with the remote control; it’s just not working anymore.
- Embrace life’s little messes—broccoli and mashed potatoes can coexist, and stuffed animals can be rearranged to my liking.
- Be more mindful of my environmental impact, starting with leaving the toilet paper roll intact.
- Improve my efficiency: my goal for 2016 is to cut my pants-putting-on time in half!
- Discover a new hobby that doesn’t require endless accessories or constant updates, and one that allows for peaceful solo play.
- Master the art of aiming—whether it’s for the toilet, the bucket, or my mouth during snack time.
- Stop comparing myself to older kids at the playground; I’m just fine being me.
- Accept the seasonal changes in life—coats in winter, sunscreen in summer.
- Work on personal grooming—less syrup in my hair, and matching socks, please!
- Try to suppress my sixth sense that triggers early wake-ups for Mom and Dad.
- Face my fears head-on, whether it’s the doctor’s office, owls, or that mysterious noise at night.
- Understand that not every piece of mail is addressed to me.
- Be a better sharer; it’s okay to let someone else play with the toy food occasionally.
- Ponder the bigger questions in life, like where all my scattered toys vanish to.
- Clean up my eating habits; maybe there’s more to life than just macaroni and cheese.
- Learn to appreciate our belongings while resisting the urge to decorate them with crayons.
- Cultivate patience—after all, 2016 is the year of reaching new heights!
- Rethink my dramatic responses to the word “no”—it hasn’t worked in the past.
- Kick the habit of fiddling with the dishwasher settings; it’s not as fun as it seems.
- Cut down on the number of times I ask “why?” each day; I’m sure it’s excessive.
- Work on building trust; I’ll take my parents’ advice on spontaneous games in parking lots more seriously.
And as for the parents—maybe it’s time for a juice cleanse as well, especially if the current diet consists of too many pastries. For more insights into home insemination, check out our blog post here. If you’re interested in further fertility resources, this site offers helpful information, and here is an excellent resource for pregnancy and home insemination.
In summary, as parents, we can only hope that our toddlers will set resolutions that reflect growth, understanding, and a bit of humor. Here’s to a new year filled with both toddler and parental growth!