As a mother, there comes a moment that feels almost surreal: your child suddenly seems embarrassed to show affection in public. “Mom, do you really have to do that here?” my daughter, Lily, exclaimed one morning. I stood frozen, watching her rush off to join her friends, my mind racing with fears. Does she still love me? Is she ashamed of me? Does she even want to be my mother anymore?
Of course, she does. At this age, she simply wants to maintain a certain image in front of her peers. I recall experiencing similar feelings when I was her age; it’s just a natural part of growing up. So, I decided to embrace the moment and treat myself to a little shopping therapy at Target while Lily spent time with her friends. Later that day, she would give me a kiss—albeit only after we’d driven away from the bus stop.
For the last three years, Lily’s bus stop has been conveniently located right in front of our house. I would walk her down the driveway, give her a kiss, and send her off with well wishes. However, this year brought something unexpected. When I leaned in to kiss her goodbye, she offered her cheek absentmindedly and dashed out without saying a word. Was she just having a rough morning? But the same thing happened the next day, and then it hit me: my teenage daughter is now too cool for public displays of affection.
As a mother of a child with special needs, I have navigated many challenges. However, I’ve also been spared some of the more typical teenage dramas. Lily doesn’t obsess over fashion trends, the latest gadgets, or even social events like sleepovers and concerts. Yet, this avoidance of “normal” teenage behavior sometimes leaves me feeling a bit wistful. When other moms chat about their daughters longing to attend concerts or big parties, I can’t help but feel a pang for Lily’s missed experiences.
Standing at the door, grappling with this unexpected rejection, I realized how significant this moment was. Isn’t this how teenage girls are supposed to react to their mothers? After a moment of reflection, I found joy in this developmental milestone. It was a testament to her growing independence. I reminded myself that this is just a phase she’ll eventually outgrow, and I decided to celebrate it. I headed to Target for a little retail therapy, knowing that later, when the bus was out of sight, she would still be willing to give me a kiss.
This experience taught me that even in the face of rejection, we can find reasons to celebrate our children’s growth. If you’re interested in exploring more about the journey of parenthood, check out this insightful piece on home insemination and for a great resource on pregnancy, visit What to Expect When You Have Your First IUI.
In summary, navigating the complexities of parenting a teenager with special needs can be bittersweet. While I miss out on typical teenage experiences, I also celebrate the unique moments that show my daughter’s growth.