When it comes to parenting, I strive for a foundation of honesty with my children, and I expect the same in return. We have open discussions about life’s more serious topics, like death and anatomy, and encourage their curiosity without shame. Yet, there are moments when a little white lie feels justifiable—and by justifiable, I mean I fully embrace it. Here are a few classic examples:
My Magical Knowledge
I may not have eyes in the back of my head, but my kids are blissfully unaware. Just the other day, I wasn’t home for breakfast, yet somehow, I knew my daughter had yogurt for breakfast and then decided to balance the empty cup on her head. When I casually asked her about it later, she looked momentarily confused before confessing. Just remember, kids: I see everything. So don’t even think about hiding the cat in the refrigerator!
Where Did It Go?
“I have no idea where it is,” I’ll say, knowing full well that I could pinpoint the location of every toy they’ve ever touched with eerie accuracy. Sure, I occasionally forget the name of a simple object like “wagon,” and I rely on lists to remember appointments, but that missing Lego arm from three weeks ago? I know exactly where it is. And yes, that birthday guitar the baby received? It’s tucked away in the basement, but you won’t hear me admit that!
Bedtime? What’s That?
Our bedtime routine is scheduled for 7 p.m., but let’s be real: I reserve the right to change that time based on a complex equation of how exhausted the kids look, the number of tantrums they’ve had, and my personal need for a breather. Sometimes, 6:45 p.m. or even 6 p.m. sounds much more appealing. So, “7 p.m. bedtime” can be a fluid concept!
The Dangers of Smoking
While I don’t dispute the real dangers of smoking, I might have embellished the urgency a bit. After encountering a man who had a laryngectomy, I chose to instill a healthy fear of smoking in my kids rather than explain the medical situation. “That man’s voice is different because he smoked, and if you smoke, you’ll smell bad and eventually lose your throat!” Sure, I may have gone a tad overboard, especially after my son started interrogating strangers about their smoking habits!
We’re All Out
When it comes to breakfast, sometimes it’s just easier to declare we’re out of maple syrup rather than endure a sugar-fueled debate that could last all morning.
A Great Help!
I want my kids to help around the house, but let’s be honest: their attempts can be chaotic. Their “putting away” usually ends with toys in a box, and watching them mix dry ingredients is a recipe for disaster. Still, I always praise their efforts with a hearty, “You were such a big help!” Maybe that’s just my way of encouraging them while I quietly clean the kitchen mess they left behind.
Bathroom Break
Sure, sometimes I really do need to use the restroom. Other times, it’s just a clever excuse to sneak away and scroll through my phone in peace for a few minutes.
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In conclusion, parenting often requires a mix of honesty and creative little fibs. Embracing these moments can help maintain peace and humor in the chaotic world of family life.