The other day, my husband went on and on about… well, honestly, I couldn’t tell you what it was about. I’ve gotten pretty good at faking interest in our conversations. I nod, say “Oh really?” now and then, and hope he doesn’t notice when my mind drifts off. It’s a little like zoning out in class. Most of the time, he buys the charade and thinks I’m actually engaged.
Don’t get me wrong—I adore my husband. He’s not just my partner; he’s my favorite person to chat with about all the fun stuff. But then there are those moments when he dives into what I like to call the “Boring Topics.”
When these Boring Topics come up, all I hear is the Charlie Brown teacher sound (you know the “wah wah wah” part) mixed with a hint of Bubba Blue from Forrest Gump. Forrest was sweet and patient, but I doubt he was paying attention through the entire “shrimp” monologue.
Here’s what falls into the Boring Topics category:
- Tech Talk: Any detailed explanation about why a disk drive or motherboard is acting up is completely lost on me. It’s all “flux capacitor” nonsense. If something’s broken, I’d rather scroll through Facebook or read a book until he fixes it.
- Travel Routes: Discussing how to get from point A to point B feels pointless since my input won’t be valued. Just tell me when we’re leaving, please.
- Football Everything: Any conversation about offense, defense, or whatever else goes on in football is a total snooze. Sure, he loves his Lions (bless their hearts), but my football insights are limited to identifying a football in a lineup—just saying “lineup of balls” cracks me up.
- Anything Starting with “Star”: Star Trek, Star Wars, Star Gate? They all blend together for me. I only know about Wesley Crusher because of The Big Bang Theory, and the name “Crusher” makes me giggle. No offense, Trekkies!
- Subject to Change: I reserve the right to declare other topics as Boring Topics without notice.
I couldn’t ask for a better partner, but sometimes I just zone out. I know I should be more interested in his passions, but honestly, some of it is just plain Boring Topics. You might think I should take more interest in his interests, and maybe I should… or maybe I just need to work on my tuning-in skills. Wink-nudge.
If anything ever happened to him, I’d struggle to reset the TV or navigate the internet. I’d miss him terribly, too. My selective listening about Boring Topics does cause a bit of friction when I get caught, though. It’s a tricky balance, and I guess I need to make a bit more effort to engage in his world—or at least improve my acting skills.
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In summary, while I appreciate my husband’s enthusiastic discussions, I sometimes wish he’d steer clear of the Boring Topics. After all, we all have our interests, and that’s what keeps things interesting!