Friendship often blossoms during those awkward teen years when you were navigating crushes on boys with braces, trading secrets during sleepovers, and sampling your parents’ hidden stash of Peppermint Schnapps. You’ve belted out Salt-N-Pepa songs in the car, captured silly moments in photo booths, and exchanged heartfelt cards that proclaim your everlasting love for one another. You’ve shared life’s ups and downs, from heartbreaks to career milestones, creating a tapestry of experiences that tie you together.
But then, life throws a curveball: one of you becomes a mom while the other remains childfree. Suddenly, the friendship landscape shifts, with conversations now centered around nap schedules, diaper changes, and baby milestones. While this new chapter can be beautiful, it often feels overwhelming for both sides. Yet, if your friendship is meaningful, there are ways to navigate this transition and keep your bond strong. Here are five strategies for childfree besties to maintain their connection with mommy friends.
1. Celebrate the Arrival of the Baby
When your bestie welcomes her little one, make an effort to acknowledge this new chapter in her life. A brief visit can go a long way, even if babies aren’t your jam. Bring along some snacks or a bottle of wine—yes, we’re talking about gifts that are always appreciated! If distance separates you, a thoughtful gift or card can help bridge the gap. And remember, showing genuine curiosity about her child’s activities is essential, even if it feels a bit forced. After all, she’s asking about your pets that she may not be too keen on either—touché!
2. Plan Outings Without the Kids
Make an effort to schedule outings that exclude the little ones. Think spa days, brunches, or coffee dates—anything that allows your friend to step away from her busy home life and enjoy some much-needed girl time. It’s equally important to include the kids in some plans, too, but choose venues where they can be entertained, allowing you both to catch up properly. Your mommy friend will appreciate the opportunity to relax while the kids have fun.
3. Be Adaptable
Life with kids is unpredictable, and plans may frequently change. Remember, your mommy bestie is juggling multiple responsibilities that often require her attention. If she has to cancel or reschedule, try not to take it personally. Children can fall ill, have accidents, or throw curveballs into even the best-laid plans. Trust that she’s doing her best to balance everything and just be patient.
4. Utilize Texting
Long phone conversations might not be feasible anymore, so embrace texting as your primary mode of communication. It’s a quick and easy way to stay in touch without the pressure of lengthy chats. Plus, it allows for spontaneous check-ins that can strengthen your bond.
5. Practice Empathy
Understand that her children will always come first, and don’t hold it against her. Raising little ones is a full-time job, and while it’s crucial for her to carve out time for friendships, it can be a challenge amid the chaos. We all know that kids often take precedence over personal desires, such as enjoying a drink with friends. So, be supportive and patient during this transitional phase.
And just to keep the spirit of friendship alive, it’s worth noting that next week we’ll explore how mommy friends can also nurture their bonds with childfree pals. Because, let’s be honest, a little effort goes a long way in preserving those cherished friendships!
In summary, nurturing a friendship between childfree besties and mommy friends requires effort, understanding, and a willingness to adapt. By celebrating each other’s lives, making time for one another, and maintaining open lines of communication, you can continue to enjoy the unique bond that brought you together in the first place.