Parenting
By Jamie Lee
Updated: Sep. 10, 2019
Originally Published: Aug. 10, 2015
Just last week, a pair of vloggers, Alex and Mia, went viral with a heartwarming video where Alex surprised Mia with the news of her pregnancy. The joyous moment spread like wildfire, capturing the hearts of many. But shortly after, they shared another video revealing their devastating miscarriage. Alongside the outpouring of sympathy, many comments echoed the sentiment, “This is why you should wait to share your pregnancy news.” I have to respectfully disagree. Keeping it a secret doesn’t make the pain of a miscarriage any easier.
It’s strange how we often shroud early pregnancy in secrecy, almost as if mentioning it could somehow jinx the whole thing. Spoiler alert: that’s simply not true. Some folks worry that announcing a pregnancy too soon leads to awkwardness if things don’t go as planned. But who does the awkwardness really affect?
After experiencing three miscarriages, I decided to keep my pregnancies private. However, when I finally got pregnant again, I chose to shout it from the rooftops! Having gone through so much, I realized I needed the support of my friends and family. By keeping my pregnancies under wraps, I was robbing myself of that crucial support. My last miscarriage occurred at 12 weeks, and when I opened up to friends and colleagues, many responded with, “Why didn’t you tell us?” Honestly, I had no good answer.
More people are beginning to understand that there’s no shame in facing pregnancy loss or fertility challenges. Just recently, a well-known tech mogul shared their baby news, including their struggles with conception. Alex and Mia announced their pregnancy early on, which allowed them to also share their heartbreak with the world—a move that could provide solace to others navigating similar waters. Plus, they received a flood of comforting messages that surely helped during such a tough time.
When it comes to sharing pregnancy news, every couple should follow their own comfort level. But there’s absolutely no shame in being open about it. In fact, you may discover how much love and support you can lean on during heartbreaking moments.
It’s high time we dismantle the stigma surrounding pregnancy loss. It’s not something to hide or feel guilty about. Sharing significant life events with loved ones is important, and we need to stop acting like it’s something to be ashamed of. If you’re looking for more information on home insemination, check out this helpful resource from Make a Mom for guidance.
In summary, enduring a miscarriage is difficult enough without the added burden of silence. Let’s break the taboo and support one another through these challenging experiences.