Updated: August 6, 2016
Originally Published: August 2, 2015
I spent the last couple of days doing some serious judging of a fellow mom. I know I shouldn’t, but just take a look at the mom I’m critiquing…
- She didn’t have her kids naturally and stopped breastfeeding way earlier than most.
- She gives her toddlers donuts for a pre-nap snack. Donuts!
- And let’s not forget the apple juice before bedtime.
- She lost her cool when her son spilled her coffee.
- Her one-year-old still clings to that bottle.
- And her three-year-old? Still rocking diapers.
- I saw her kids dart away from her outside more than once this week. She chased them, spilling everything from her purse and tripping over her own yoga pants—because let’s be real, she’s always wearing them.
- She doesn’t shower every day.
- I caught her sneaking peanut butter M&M’s in the kitchen while her one-year-old threw a huge tantrum.
- She lets her kids cry it out… until she doesn’t. Can’t she just pick a method and stick to it?
- In practically every photo she shares on Facebook, her kids are running around without clothes.
- She keeps her kids in a Super Play Yard, which looks a lot like baby jail.
- I witnessed her kids spill Cheerios on the floor and then eat them right off the ground!
- She openly bribes her kids in public with cookies.
- I even saw her doze off on the couch while her kids sat in front of the TV, munching on Cheerios off the floor.
- Her son wouldn’t stop standing up in the shopping cart while her other son was trying to pop open a bottle of shampoo they were buying—probably hoping for a drink.
- At every meal, her oldest cries about having to eat… unless it’s donuts on the menu.
- She enjoys a Diet Coke daily.
- Her apartment is often a chaotic mess, decorated with random DIY “art,” and none of her furniture matches.
- She keeps saying she’ll start exercising or go on a diet, but I honestly haven’t seen a change in her figure. Her wardrobe is plain, and a haircut is long overdue.
- Her family is perpetually late for everything.
- Her one-year-old sometimes wakes up at night and takes forever to fall back asleep.
- She yearns for some alone time and occasionally wishes for a few days without kids. Why does she need a break? She’s a Stay-At-Home Mom! Isn’t her life basically a vacation in yoga pants?
That mom I was judging sounds pretty terrible, right?
Oh, did I mention? That mom is ME.
I’ve reached a point in my life where I’m constantly worried about what others think of me and my parenting. I’ve been avoiding outings with my kids, fearing temper tantrums, disobedience, or a potential meltdown (on my part). I even keep many of my parenting decisions under wraps, anticipating disapproval or unsolicited advice. I won’t let my husband share a photo on Facebook if the background doesn’t look pristine or if my youngest is seen with a bottle. My life has become so consumed by others’ opinions that I’ve forgotten to enjoy it.
So, my new mantra is: WHO CARES!?
The only reason people judge other parents is to feel better about themselves because deep down, they know they have flaws too.
Sometimes, when people offer advice, they genuinely want to help. I don’t have to take their suggestions, but I can listen without getting defensive.
I may not be perfect, but I know I’m a GOOD mom. From now on, others can critique my parenting all they like. I even helped them out by sharing this list.
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Summary:
In this lighthearted reflection, Jamie Allen shares her amusing yet honest self-judgments about her parenting choices, revealing her struggles with societal expectations and the need for acceptance. Despite the humorous critique of her own parenting, she ultimately embraces her imperfections and encourages others to do the same.