Scrolling through the photos on my phone, I stumble upon a picture that makes my heart sink. “Who took this dreadful shot of me?” I think, with waves of self-criticism crashing over me. Just as I’m about to delete it, my son walks into the room.
“Do you know anything about this picture?” I ask, turning the screen towards him. His face lights up with a broad smile. “I snapped that of you in Tahoe! You looked so lovely laying there. I couldn’t help it, Mom.”
I respond, “You should ask me before taking pictures with my phone.”
“I know,” he replies, “but seriously, look how pretty you look!”
I glance at the photo once more, trying to see it through his eyes. My daughter joins us and peeks at the image. “That could be a postcard, Mom,” she grins. “You’re so beautiful. I love it.”
Taking a deep breath, I realize this is just what I needed. My instinct is often to fixate on flaws and imperfections, but I’m beginning to notice more positive aspects.
Sure, I still see my dimply thighs, but I also see a mom who just spent hours exploring the lake with her kids. Yes, my arms are chubby, yet they were the same arms that helped my little ones navigate rocky paths and hot sand. And while I might wear a black bathing suit to disguise my weight, I also see a wild and adventurous mom who adores her children fiercely.
Like many women, I’ve battled with weight issues for most of my life. It’s something I’ve learned to accept; I’ve never been one with a naturally slim physique. Right now, I weigh more than I have in a decade. But this time, I refuse to let my weight hold me back. I’m rocking tank tops, sundresses, and swimsuits in public, running around playing with my kids, and occasionally feeling attractive. Yes, you heard that right!
“I feel pretty. Oh so pretty. I feel pretty, and witty, and bright.” Well, maybe not exactly that, but close enough. Is it because I’m aging? Or perhaps it’s that I have bigger worries than my appearance? Maybe it’s simply the way my kids gaze at me with admiration.
Ultimately, it doesn’t matter. The significant change is that I no longer harbor hatred for my body. Admitting that is a monumental step for me, and it’s hard to even comprehend. I’m not giving up on exercising or striving for better health; those goals remain important to me because I want to stick around for my family.
For now, though, I want to embrace my body as it is. I want to see myself through the eyes of my children. Thank you, little ones.
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In summary, embracing self-acceptance can be a challenging journey, but viewing ourselves through our children’s eyes can be transformative. Their love can help us see the beauty that we often overlook in ourselves.