What Really Matters in a Friendship

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Listen, I don’t really care if your living room looks like a tornado hit it. I’ll gladly move the laundry off the couch so we can sit together, folding clothes while sharing a good laugh about our mutual dislike for putting away clean laundry. I’m not bothered by your slobbering, hyperactive dog. I’ll embrace his wet kisses and throw that tennis ball across the yard without a second thought. And if your fridge is empty? No worries, I already had a snack before I arrived. Your mediocre coffee and microwave popcorn are totally my jam!

I’m not judging you for how you look when you step outside, whether your purse came from Payless or if every item in your closet is a thrift store find. If you prefer shopping at fancy boutiques, that’s cool too. We can both manage if your hair needs a touch-up, if you have a quirky mole, an embarrassing tattoo, or if you’ve recently put on a few pounds that, let’s be honest, went nowhere near your chest.

I’m indifferent about your dietary choices or whether you’re feeding your kids organic everything or indulging in the occasional fast food. I won’t bat an eye if you sometimes opt for chicken nuggets and a Tinkerbell movie just to get some peace and quiet and maybe treat yourself to a margarita afterward. Been there, done that! A little processed food here and there isn’t the end of the world.

If your child has a meltdown in public, I’m not going to be that person who gives you the side-eye. We all have those days. And of course, I’ll hold your baby while you rush off to the restroom with your toddler, who’s already had an accident.

Your job title doesn’t define you in my eyes, nor does your journey to find your passion. Whether you hit the yoga mat daily or only attend church when your grandmother insists, it’s all good. One day you’ll finish that novel or kickstart that business, and I’ll be right there cheering you on, even if it takes us until we’re ninety-seven to get there.

Feel free to vent to me about your partner’s latest antics or how your mom is getting on your last nerve. We all fantasize about escaping life for a little while, and trust me, I dream of a cozy hotel room where I can binge-watch trashy shows and order room service for days.

It’s completely fine if you can’t cook to save your life and haven’t hosted a Pinterest-worthy dinner party. Let’s just order takeout from that amazing little Thai spot down the street — you’re going to love it!

I don’t think less of you for making a mistake that resulted in losing your job. I admire your courage to go back to school and pursue your passion, even if it means graduating at thirty-nine. Age is just a number, right?

In the grand scheme of things, none of that matters. What’s truly important is this:

Are you kind? That’s what I genuinely care about. I want to know that you have good intentions, even when life doesn’t go according to plan. I need you to show compassion to children and servers alike. Your treatment of animals matters too, regardless of how they look or whether they end up on your plate.

I care that you communicate with kindness, that you own up to your mistakes, and that you apologize when necessary. Everyone stumbles sometimes, and what matters most is our ability to learn from those moments.

Your political views? Irrelevant. Your faith? Doesn’t matter. What I care about is that your words and actions come from a place of love, not hate. I value empathy and the ability to embrace others, even if they’re different from you.

Amid the chaos of our hectic lives, I cherish those fleeting moments we share that bring meaning, laughter, and even a few tears. I want us to part feeling uplifted, a little stronger, and knowing we’re not alone. Because, in the end, that’s what really matters in friendship.

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Summary

In friendship, the essence lies in kindness and understanding, not in external appearances or life choices. It’s about supporting each other through ups and downs while sharing genuine moments of connection. True friendship thrives on compassion, empathy, and the ability to uplift one another, making us feel less alone in our chaotic lives.

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