Hey There, New Parents!
How’s everything going? Feeling a bit drained? Perhaps a little less energetic these days with those late-night feedings or trying to keep up with a toddler who’s determined to give you gray hairs – you know, the one who’s fascinated by electrical outlets, jumps down stairs, and refuses to eat anything that resembles a vegetable?
You might be feeling a tad overwhelmed. Out of your depth. Wondering if you’ll ever master this parenting gig while guilt creeps in with those “What am I doing?” moments.
How can this be? You crushed calculus, you’re running a thriving business, and maybe you even know how to drive a manual transmission. And yet, if someone handed you a parenting pop quiz tomorrow, you’d probably scrape a C+ at best. Maybe a B- on a good day after a strong coffee and a burst of energy.
It seems like every other parent has everything figured out. They look like they’re acing this parenting thing and, dare I say it, are even – wait for it – better at it than you.
So, let’s cut to the chase: they are better.
Yes, other parents are better. They excel in every conceivable way. They’re fantastic at discipline, motivating their kids, and ensuring their little ones stay out of trouble. Their children will have a thriving social life, fulfilling experiences, and probably won’t need therapy as adults. Their kids will simply shine, all because these parents seem to have it down to a science.
I learned this truth a bit too late for my own kids. It took me 16 years of combing through parenting forums, reading books, devouring articles, and finally downloading the “Why Other Parents Are Superior” app to fully grasp how many ways I fell short. It’s been a tough pill to swallow.
To save you from my lengthy journey of self-realization and inevitable disappointment, I present to you the ultimate list of parents who are undeniably better than I am.
In no particular order:
- Strict Parents
- Easygoing Parents
- Urban Parents exposing their kids to culture and street smarts
- Suburban Parents with spacious backyards and Brazil-trained soccer coaches
- Country Parents whose kids learn responsibility through farm work
- Vaccinators
- Non-Vaccinators
- Parents who keep a spotless home
- Germ-loving Parents focused on building immunity
- Breastfeeding Advocates
- Formula Fans
- Faithful Parents
- Secular Parents
- Parents unsure about divine help for their parenting journey
- Conservative Families
- Liberal Households
- Anarchist Families
- Experts like Dr. Phil
- Free-Range Parents
- Leash Users
- Organic Enthusiasts
- Tech-savvy Parents
- Unplugged Families
- Parents who are stricter with cell phone use than you were
- Authoritarian Parents
- Authoritative Parents
- Positive Reinforcement Parents
- Permissive Parents
- Super Nanny-types
- Parenting Gurus
- Notable figures in child development
- Celebrity Parents
- Parents with only one child
- Parents with two kids
- Parents with large families
- Iconic TV Families like The Cosbys or The Brady Bunch
- Parents who comfort crying kids
- Parents who let kids cry it out
- Co-sleepers
- Those who believe in separate beds
- Spanking Advocates
- Non-spankers
- Public School Supporters
- Private School Enthusiasts
- Homeschooling Families
- Natural Birth Advocates
- Those who prefer medical interventions
- Parents who have it all figured out
- Your In-Laws
- Mother Nature herself
- Martha Stewart (need I say more?)
- Pinterest Parents with picture-perfect lives
- Parents who blog about their parenting tales
- Busy Parents who can’t keep up with baby books
- Uber Moms who do it all
- Good Enough Moms
- Parents who play with their kids
- Parents who teach practical skills
- Stay-at-home Parents
- Working Parents
- Parents who let their kids play outside
- Parents who don’t mind fast food every now and then
- Parents who have chickens (yes, chickens!)
- My Own Mother
I might have missed a few. I’m not exactly a pro at compiling definitive parenting lists. But surely, this is enough to convince you that you’ll never measure up either.
So, carry on! Unless you’re a total jerk in several ways, your unique brand of parenting is probably just fine for your equally unique kid. Even if things feel chaotic, remember that you know more than you think you do. Well, maybe.
Just remember, you’ll never be as good as Dr. Spock.
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Summary: This fun and slightly tongue-in-cheek article reflects on the overwhelming feeling new parents experience when comparing themselves to others. With a humorous list of various parenting styles and types, it highlights the universal struggle of feeling inadequate in the parenting arena while also encouraging self-acceptance.