Parenting
A Mom’s Playbook for Everyday Gaming
By Jessica Hartman
Updated: Aug. 21, 2015
Originally Published: July 5, 2015
When you think of gaming, the first image that often comes to mind is a bunch of guys huddled around consoles. There’s your little brother with Minecraft, your husband conquering worlds on Xbox, and even your dad trying to beat his high score on Angry Birds (is it just me, or are these guys everywhere?). But what about the lady gamers? Turns out, they’re often busy being moms!
I’ve always had a passion for video games, dedicating countless hours to them before the little ones came along. Nowadays, instead of gaming marathons, I find myself juggling the demands of motherhood, racing to keep my kids entertained and happy. Who has time to sit glued to a screen anymore? I’m too busy managing a never-ending list of tasks that require my full attention.
But just because I can’t game like I used to doesn’t mean I can’t have fun with it! I’ve taken some classic gaming experiences and given them my own motherly twist. If you’re a gaming mom at heart or just want to sprinkle some fun into your daily routine, check out this playbook for real-life gaming—no console, screen, or mouse required. (Well, unless you count your child as a “controller,” which, let’s be honest, is probably accurate.)
If You Enjoy: Tetris
Try: Organizing the Tupperware in your fridge
First, set your sights on that elusive container of Cool Whip you cleverly stashed in the back, far away from tiny hands. You’ll have to navigate through what feels like a mountain of Tupperware (about 47 containers, give or take) just to reach it. After consuming a good chunk of the Cool Whip (or whatever food item you’ve craved), brace yourself to fit those containers back into the fridge. Spoiler alert: You’ll wonder how they all fit in there in the first place, and then you’ll drown your frustrations in the remaining Cool Whip.
If You Enjoy: Frogger
Try: Taking your little one for a stroll without a stroller
On a sunny day, invite your toddler to lace up her light-up shoes for a special walk. Emphasize the golden rule: “When we’re near the street, you hold my hand—and don’t let go!” When she inevitably slips away and makes a break for the street, channel your inner Frogger and leap into action to save the day (and yourself) from oncoming traffic.
If You Enjoy: Pac-Man
Try: Eating anything while your kids are awake
This one’s pretty straightforward. It’s all about the frantic search for food while dodging speedy little mini-monsters (a.k.a. your kids) who seem determined to devour your meal before you can even take a bite. Sound familiar? It’s basically every meal of motherhood!
If You Enjoy: Farmville
Try: Throwing your kid an epic birthday bash
If you love investing time into something that yields little reward, this is your jam! In my experience, kids care about three things at parties: cake, presents, and playing with friends. So, get ready to spend hours researching how to carve a watermelon into an intricate pirate ship. Practice it repeatedly, then set up a treasure hunt for the kids. Just be prepared for the birthday star to discover all your hiding spots early, ruining the surprise for everyone. Oh, and when those kids inevitably destroy your watermelon masterpiece while sword-fighting with sticks, just toss it in the trash. Mission accomplished—time wasted!
If You Enjoy: Candy Crush Saga
Try: Letting your child pour her own bowl of Lucky Charms
When the inevitable cereal spill happens, you’ll have your very own live-action version of the game. Bonus points if you find three blue moons stuck to your sock in the aftermath!
If You Enjoy: Words With Friends
Try: Forming a coherent thought
Gather those jumbled snippets of information swirling in your mind and attempt to create a coherent idea. This game becomes exponentially more difficult after you become a mother. You might find yourself stuck in this level until the kids are grown!
And here’s a pro tip: Sharing “extra lives” with fellow mom gamers is a surefire way to boost your skills. Those extra lives could be wine, chocolate, or an invitation for a much-needed sleepover.
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In summary, motherhood is a game in itself, and by embracing its challenges with a playful spirit, we can navigate the chaos while enjoying the journey. So gear up, fellow moms; we’ve got this!