Let’s be real. Adults reminisce about those first freedoms—like the exhilarating taste of independence, the butterflies of a first kiss, mastering the art of driving, and all the carefree moments with friends. But they often forget that being a teenager is more like a hormonal ice cream sundae, topped with uncertainty and a sprinkle of self-doubt—complete with bad skin as the cherry on top.
So, let me set the record straight for the younger crowd: Your teenage years are definitely not the peak of your life.
This year, I’ll hit the big 45. How did I get here so quickly? It feels like just yesterday I was at my dad’s 40th birthday bash, where he chuckled through a singing telegram and my mischievous mom had a cheeky cake made for him. Now, as he turns 72, it feels a bit like a wrinkle in time, borrowing a phrase from Madeleine L’Engle.
Now, about those wrinkles—I have a fair share of them, especially around my eyes. They’re laugh lines, badges of honor earned through the years. They tell the story of my life. Sure, I could consider Botox or fillers, and that doesn’t seem as terrifying as it once did. But honestly, reaching midlife has gifted me the ability to embrace my face and body just as they are. No filters. What you see is what you get!
That’s the beauty of this stage in life. My brain has finally settled down, allowing me to see things as they truly are, rather than how I wish them to be. Instead of focusing on regrets, I reflect on the journey I’ve taken and the lessons learned. Yes, some roads were bumpier, like grappling with an eating disorder in my 20s or navigating an unhealthy relationship. But my 40s represent a collection of experiences, helping me to finally discern what truly matters.
In my 20s, I was a bit lost:
- I had no clue what I wanted to be when I grew up.
- I didn’t feel like an adult.
- My body felt like the enemy, and all I saw were flaws.
- I believed love could conquer everything.
- And then came graduation: Yikes, I need to support myself now!
Fast forward to my 30s:
- Love doesn’t always conquer all.
- Divorce knocked me down and made me second-guess everything.
- Starting over was terrifying.
- My body and mind were in a constant battle.
- And I still asked myself, “Who am I? Am I an adult yet?”
If my 20s and 30s were like sea grass swaying in the wind, my 40s feel like a sturdy flagpole planted firmly in the sand. I’ve learned to listen to wise friends, figuring out what I want from a partner before diving into marriage again. I’ve faced tough times that made me stronger. And now, I’m a mom.
I think I’m finally nearing adulthood!
I see my body as a vessel of strength and beauty; it has been through a lot. My arms are for hugging, not for criticizing my triceps. My legs are for walking and running, not for obsessing over size. And my torso? It once housed a glorious baby, and I was even cut open to bring my son into this world, the light of my life.
At 44, I’m no longer intimidated by other women. I’ve learned that lifting others up also lifts me. Sure, I might envy someone else’s figure, but I no longer need to justify why I don’t resemble a fitness model. I’ve accepted that I love ice cream, and I’m okay with a little roundness in trade for that joy. Understanding my body feels much easier now.
And you know what else is great about being in your 40s? Confidence. I know what I want from life, and I know what I deserve. The bumps along the way don’t hold me back; they lift me higher each day. Another perk? I’ve figured out my career path—taking a leap of faith from a full-time gig to freelancing has paid off, thanks to the network I built over the years.
There are countless worries out there if you let them creep in. But turning 40 shouldn’t be one of them. Forty is simply… forty. It doesn’t need to be anything else; it’s the perfect midpoint of your existence. So throw your hands up and embrace it!
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In summary, adulthood is a thrilling ride filled with self-acceptance, confidence, and the realization that life really does get better with age. Wrinkles? They’re just reminders of all the laughter and love.