I adore the thrill and anticipation of a special occasion, but I could do without the endless planning, chores, and those pesky expectations that often come with it. So, when my eldest son, Max, proposed we establish a new family holiday named Giving Day, I was caught in a delightful tug-of-war between excitement and mild annoyance.
Max’s vision for Giving Day was straightforward. We would draw names for gift exchanges, partake in fun family activities, and then, as he put it, “just go back to our normal day.” My eyebrows raised with curiosity. “Where did you come up with that idea?” I asked. “I thought it would be fun!” he replied with a grin. While I admired his imaginative spirit and eagerness to give, I couldn’t shake the nagging feeling that this could easily morph into a chaotic day filled with “More Stuff to Deal With” or “Buy Me Something I Don’t Need.”
As a hopeful minimalist, my goal is to declutter and simplify life—not to invite more items into our home. My husband and I were already juggling enough responsibilities, and adding another holiday that revolved around purchasing gifts felt overwhelming. Still, Max’s enthusiasm was infectious, and I found myself intrigued.
“What if we also give to people outside our family?” I suggested, trying to steer the focus toward kindness rather than consumerism. “Yeah!” he exclaimed, nodding with excitement. “We could bake cookies for our neighbors or do something nice for someone else.” We brainstormed ways to ensure Giving Day was centered around generosity beyond ourselves, while also considering the financial implications. I wanted him to grasp that gifts don’t always have to come with a hefty price tag.
“Maybe we could make homemade gifts or just buy small ones for each other?” Max proposed. “That sounds good! And you boys can use your own money, right?” He quickly agreed but added, “I can do it, but Teddy might need some help since he doesn’t have his own money.” Practical thinking for a kiddo!
With a clear plan in place, Max boldly marked “GIVING DAY” on the calendar for the next free weekend. A few days before the big event, we drew names to determine who would give to whom. Once the gifts were exchanged, we’d whip up some cookies for our neighbors. The boys were eager and asked for assistance in their gift-making endeavors.
As Giving Day approached, despite my better judgment, I found myself feeling optimistic—always a recipe for unrealistic expectations and potential letdowns. We started the day with a relaxed vibe, exchanged gifts, and I snapped some pictures of the smiles. Max gifted me a beautiful journal, I surprised my husband with a bag of spicy almonds, he gave Teddy an Iron Man mask, and Teddy presented Max with a wind-up hopping eyeball he found at a garage sale.
But then, just as predicted, the magic of Giving Day began to fade. It quickly transformed into Sibling Rivalry Day, which morphed into “I Want Yours” Day, followed by Yelling Day and Go to Your Room Day. Sure, we managed to bake cookies for our neighbors, but the delivery was a bit sour, as the rain poured down on our heads.
Overall, that first Giving Day, like many holidays, didn’t quite meet my expectations. There were more tears and squabbles than moments of gratitude. Yet, on the flip side, there were also beautiful moments that exceeded what I hoped for. The joy in the voice of our five-year-old neighbor as she thanked us for the cookies was priceless. The boys decided to make handmade gifts for the next Giving Day, and later that night, I jotted down my thoughts in the journal Max had picked out for me.
We recently celebrated our second Giving Day, and guess what? It didn’t go as planned either. My husband had to stay home to wait for the plumber due to a broken water heater, missing our scheduled food-packing activity. Teddy burst into tears when Max handed him his gift—a drawing and a “gift certificate” he made—because it didn’t include the Carolina Panthers, his current favorite team. And hey, he’s just five years old; tears are part of the package!
Yet, through the ups and downs, I’m already looking forward to next Giving Day. Just like most family gatherings, the chaos blends with the love, bringing forth togetherness, forgiveness, and a generous spirit. Isn’t that what we, as parents, truly want to give our children? Interestingly, it turns out that our little ones often teach us the most valuable lessons about giving.
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Summary
My family’s attempt to create a new holiday, Giving Day, was a mix of excitement and chaos. While it didn’t go as perfectly planned due to sibling rivalry and unexpected mishaps, the day also brought moments of joy and togetherness. As we navigate the messiness of family life, we learn valuable lessons about generosity and love.