So, here’s the deal: I’m a beautifully chaotic person who fell in love with another wonderfully chaotic person, and together we’ve created three delightful little whirlwinds of chaos. My partner, Alex, and I quickly figured out that we were flying by the seat of our pants when it came to parenting. This became glaringly obvious during our Intro to Parenting class seven years ago, when the instructor asked, “Raise your hand if you’ve never changed a diaper!” and we were the only two with our hands proudly in the air.
At that moment, we knew our unborn child was in for quite the adventure. We all had a good chuckle, but the reality was clear: we were in over our heads.
Because we started from a place of uncertainty, we decided early on to keep our expectations manageable. We encourage our kids to strive for their best but emphasize kindness as our family’s top priority.
I want my children to be kind to everyone, not just those who look or think like them. Yes, you heard me right—everyone! This includes people of all colors, orientations, and backgrounds. Yes, even the quirky ones—because let’s face it, we’re all a bit strange in our own ways. Yes, this means treating the homeless with dignity, acknowledging the punk rockers, and being gentle with the little ones and even the elderly.
PEOPLE ARE PEOPLE. BE KIND TO THEM. That’s our family motto, plain and simple.
The challenge of parenting is that you can never be entirely sure if you’re doing it right. You just keep pushing forward, and then one day, something happens that makes you think, “Maybe, just maybe, I’m on the right track.” Recently, we had such a moment.
My son, 6-year-old Cooper, received a text from his teacher saying he was chosen for the “Good Citizenship” award for being so kind, helpful, and patient with a boy named Leo in their class. “Who’s Leo?” I asked, curious. She explained that Leo has autism and that Cooper had really made a positive impact on him.
Cooper had mentioned before that there was a funny boy in class who did silly things, but I had no clue it was Leo. We know families with children on the spectrum, so I was surprised he hadn’t drawn attention to the differences.
The next morning, I casually asked, “So, what’s the deal with Leo?”
“Oh!” Cooper exclaimed, “Leo is my friend! He has a disability. I know all about disabilities. Leo’s disability is that he just can’t stop being funny!” I had to turn away to hide my face as I felt the tears welling up. Then, with a mouth full of cereal, Cooper added, “His favorite color is rainbow! Isn’t that awesome?!”
A few days later, I found myself in a crowded gym full of parents, waiting for the awards ceremony to begin. Cooper sat quietly, blissfully unaware of the honor awaiting him. I watched him, feeling the condensation drip from my iced coffee, marveling at how he had grown. Just a year ago, sitting still was a challenge for him, but now—look at him!
When I arrived at his end-of-year party, he spotted me and shouted, “HI, MOMMY!” in his usual exuberant way. Next to him sat a boy I had never seen before.
“Who’s your friend?” I asked, intrigued.
“Oh! This is Leo!” he beamed.
“Hi, Leo! I’m Cooper’s mom.” Leo smiled back, and I instantly liked him.
The world certainly doesn’t need more unkindness; it needs more compassionate souls. I genuinely hope my children can be those souls.
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Summary:
Raising kids to embody kindness rather than perfection is a journey filled with learning and growth. In a humorous and heartfelt narrative, Harmony Taylor shares her experiences as a parent, emphasizing the importance of compassion and understanding for all individuals. Her son’s recognition for kindness towards a classmate illustrates the positive impact of nurturing empathy in children. As parents, it’s vital to prioritize kindness, paving the way for a more compassionate world.