I’ve heard tales of moms and their kids eagerly anticipating lazy summer days filled with sleeping in, sipping lemonade, and chasing fireflies in the backyard. However, as an autism mom, I can tell you that’s more myth than reality—at least in my house.
In our home, routines remain intact. Sure, there are a few adjustments to the schedule, but believe me, those changes require a negotiation process that could rival any labor union meeting. And let’s be clear: I can’t simply threaten to take a walk if things don’t go my way.
While other families may relish the chance to sleep in, my little one rises at the crack of dawn, regardless of the season. Why? Well, we still have school, believe it or not. Yes, I’m talking about that year-round schooling concept that other moms joke about during those early August chats. My son attends school not as a fun summer activity, but because it’s crucial for preventing regression. So, no perks here—just the reality of needing that structure. And to add to the fun, summer classes start even earlier! My coffee maker is my closest ally in this chaotic routine.
Unplanned days? Not in our vocabulary. We’re still juggling school and therapy appointments, all while navigating the scheduling chaos that comes when therapists decide to take vacations. How dare they! I once found myself grumbling when our music therapist took a week off for his wife’s new baby, thinking, “Well, it’s not like you gave birth!” I know, I can be a bit of a jerk sometimes.
Every winter, my husband and I experience what I call “Vacation Amnesia.” In a moment of optimism, we book a week for a classic family getaway. But when I start drafting my packing list, reality hits—and it keeps growing. Nothing screams maternal love like whisper-yelling, “Please be quiet! Other guests are trying to sleep!” If you think your kid is loud, take him on vacation. Trust me, the front desk will call you with a noise complaint. (Pro tip: Always leave a generous tip for the housekeeping staff.)
Here, lazy summer days are a myth. Our mornings stay the same, and I’m usually not far behind my son when bedtime rolls around. Sticking to a schedule is essential for helping him manage his anxiety. We do get a bit of a break between the end of the school year and the start of the Extended School Year (ESY), but keeping him entertained during that time can be tricky. Too much downtime can lead to trouble, and let’s face it—autism doesn’t take a vacation.
I make every effort to ensure he enjoys his summer, but we have to make adjustments. BBQs? I’ll be feeding him before we go or bringing food that he can eat. Fireworks? Oh boy, where are those noise-canceling headphones? Otherwise, my little guy will be trying to climb back into my womb from sheer fright. Pool parties? You haven’t seen a helicopter mom until you’ve witnessed an autism mom at the pool. His attraction to water and fearless attitude can be a bit unnerving.
It may not match your vision of a perfect summer, but it’s our normal. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to craft a social story about the importance of sunscreen for my son, who has sensory sensitivities.
Summary:
Living with autism means that summer is anything but lazy. From early mornings and year-round schooling to packed schedules filled with therapy sessions, every day is a balancing act. While other families enjoy downtime, we adapt our plans to ensure our child feels secure and engaged. Even though our summer days are filled with adjustments and challenges, we make the most of them, focusing on what works best for our family.
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