I can hardly believe it myself. For years, shorts season has been a real struggle for me. But this year? After all the hard work I’ve put into embracing self-love? Seriously, I’m ready to take the plunge!
All day, I found myself unusually aware of my body. I felt the little crease at my waist—the extra skin that appeared after having a child. I noticed how my thighs have been rubbing together since my middle school days. And every time I passed a window, I’d catch a glimpse of my upper arms and think they looked larger than I’d like.
By the end of the day, I was in a pretty sour mood, feeling down about myself and my looks. I wanted to crawl under the covers and hide from the world.
Spring: The Season of Diets
I think my body image struggles began when I was about 12. It was time to pull out the shorts, and I wasn’t happy with what I saw in the mirror. I was in a grown-up size but didn’t feel like a grown-up. That’s when I embarked on my first diet, and it began a 20-year rollercoaster of dieting.
My Body Never Measured Up
I fluctuated between heavy and light, but no matter my size, I always felt inadequate. Even when I reached a weight I never thought I could achieve, I still picked myself apart, focusing on what needed fixing. It became a vicious cycle of feeling “fat,” but what was I really feeling?
The Truth About My Feelings
It dawned on me that when I put on those shorts, I wasn’t feeling fat; I was feeling inadequate, uncomfortable, judged, and ashamed. I realized I was grieving the loss of the carefree girl I once was. That 12-year-old girl was perfect just as she was.
I often think about how much time I wasted obsessing over calories and miles instead of enjoying life. I restricted my food, loathed my body, and lived in a constant state of comparison where I always came up short.
Pregnancy Changed My Perspective
Interestingly, when I was pregnant with my daughter, it was the first time I actually appreciated my body. I was in awe of how it transformed to nurture my baby. While breastfeeding was a bit more challenging for body acceptance, I focused on the joy of motherhood.
But now? My “baby” is over two years old. Can I still love my body when it’s not performing a miracle? Bodies like mine often don’t get the love they deserve in our society. While there have been strides in body positivity, finding plus-size shorts that don’t come with restrictive fabrics is still a challenge.
Time for a Change
I’ve wasted too much time—starting from that day at 12 when I decided my body wasn’t good enough, to last night when I let my insecurities keep me from enjoying time with my little one. That’s it—no more!
Today, I’m wearing shorts and embracing my beauty. I’m joining the empowering movement called #takebackpostpartum, and I’m claiming my right to love my body just as it is. Today, #iwillwearshorts while I take a stroll to the park with my daughter. I’ll appreciate my strong legs, own my body, and be fully present.
No more wasted time on self-hatred! Who’s with me? Who else is ready to rock some shorts?
If you’re looking for inspiration or advice on your own journey, check out this fantastic resource on fertility and pregnancy.
In summary, it’s time to break free from the chains of self-doubt and embrace our bodies. Let’s wear those shorts with pride!