When we handed our son his first smartphone, we had a serious chat about its responsible use. We advised him to ignore calls from unfamiliar numbers and emphasized that the device was primarily for his safety—not just for chatting with friends. When setting up his email, I made sure it synced with my iPad too. While I don’t pry into his conversations, I do keep the spam at bay and unsubscribe him from unwanted mailing lists. However, I draw the line at overt surveillance, even though I could if I wanted to.
In stark contrast, the South Korean government takes a different approach. They rolled out an app called Smart Sheriff, designed not only to block minors from accessing inappropriate content but also allowing parents to keep tabs on their kids’ phone usage and activities. Similar apps track location data or trigger alerts when certain sensitive topics are searched, like bullying or self-harm.
What’s particularly alarming is that this app must be installed on every phone belonging to someone under 18, with no official way to opt-out. Of course, savvy kids could always find loopholes—like using an old phone from a parent—but the idea of mandated monitoring is something that would raise eyebrows in the U.S.
Beyond the forced installation issue, it begs a larger question: how much should we really monitor our children? Don’t they deserve a bit of privacy? It’s not entirely unlike reading their diaries, is it? Maybe it is a bit different. I recall an episode of Law & Order: SVU where a father expressed that he wasn’t worried about his daughter’s online activities, but rather the potential threats lurking out there. I share those concerns, though I’m no NYPD detective. Still, I wouldn’t invade my kids’ private thoughts or install software to track their every move. Danger exists beyond the digital realm, and it’s crucial that we teach our children to recognize it instead of fostering resentment by hovering over them.
When I worry about my son spending too much time on his devices, we set limits until his homework is done or simply ask him to take a break. I also try to be mindful of my own screen time; I might just be the biggest offender in our household! Maybe my kids should install an app on my phone to remind me to unplug and engage with them instead. Or they could just ask me. No app needed!
This article was originally published on May 16, 2015.
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Summary
In today’s digital age, the debate over parental monitoring of children’s online activities is more relevant than ever. While some governments enforce strict regulations, many parents grapple with finding the right balance between safety and privacy. It’s essential to educate kids about real-world dangers rather than resorting to invasive tactics that could damage trust.