As my daughter inches closer to her teenage years at 12, I find myself hoping we’re nearing the end of the “tween moodiness” saga. Let’s be real: I can only handle so many door-slamming, eye-rolling, “I love you, wait no, I hate you!” moments before I start resembling a character from an old film noir.
According to a recent piece on Today’s Parent, this emotional rollercoaster can be attributed to growth hormones taking charge while the brain’s emotional control center is still a work in progress. “It’s like driving a car with the gas pedal pressed to the floor while the brakes are stuck in traffic,” says Dr. Mark Jensen, psychologist and author of Making Sense of Your Teen’s Brain. In simpler terms, tweens are a ball of feelings, and they typically won’t admit they need help managing them. So, what can we do? Here are three tips to help you cope with those turbulent mood swings—without reaching for a glass of wine!
1. Don’t Bite the Bait
As parenting coach and expert, Emma Franks, points out, this stage is all about asserting independence. When your tween challenges you, stay calm and collected. Instead of reacting to their tone, focus on the actual message. If they declare your lasagna is “the worst,” respond with “I’m sorry you’re not a fan,” and then shift the conversation to something lighter. This way, you keep the peace while reminding them you’re still the boss—even if they think otherwise.
2. Promote Healthy Routines
When your tween is feeling moody, fatigue can often be a culprit. Encourage them to get moving—aim for at least an hour of activity each day! Whether it’s a bike ride or a stroll around the block, joining them can make it even more enjoyable (and burn off some of that pent-up energy). Just remember, balance is key; they still need nutritious meals and enough sleep to stay on track. A little bit of guidance goes a long way in their mood management.
3. Just Listen
At this age, sometimes all your tween needs is a listening ear. Instead of jumping into “fix-it” mode, take the time to really hear what they’re saying. Open-ended chats during low-key moments, like during a car ride or while tossing a ball around, can lead to meaningful conversations. Some tweens even find texting to be a less intimidating way to communicate. If that works for yours, don’t hesitate to give it a go!
Lastly, it’s important to recognize that the mood swings of preteens can sometimes mirror signs of depression. If your child seems persistently sad or anxious, seeking professional help is always a wise choice. For more insights, you can check out this excellent resource on pregnancy and emotional well-being here.
In summary, while the journey through tween moodiness can feel like an uphill battle, utilizing these strategies can help foster a more peaceful home environment. Remember, you’re not alone in this adventure, and with a little patience and understanding, you’ll emerge victorious!