I’ve been itching to put pen to paper—well, fingers to keyboard—on this subject for a while. Honestly, I’ve been wanting to write anything at all! But I have to be quick, as I’m on borrowed time before my 19-month-old gets into some mischief.
You know the drill:
- Fishing out last week’s pizza crust from the trash for a “snack.”
- Trying to wrestle off the electrical outlet covers, with varying degrees of success.
- Opening the oven door like a budding chef.
- Investigating the stove like a little kitchen scientist.
- Discovering a steak knife in the dishwasher and potentially sparking a Barbie hostage situation.
- Breaking childproof locks off cabinets using nothing but sheer willpower.
- Relocating my car keys to undisclosed locations—seriously, where do they go?
Maybe my brain’s been on a bit of a holiday these past 18 months, but I distinctly recall hearing a few sweeping statements about third children while I was pregnant with mine:
- “They just go with the flow. They have to!”
- “They’re soooo chill!”
Interesting perspective, I suppose. But let’s be real—BS comes to mind.
I know generalizations are just that, but I’m starting to think they come from the same folks who told me I’d one day forget the agony of childbirth or that one tiny piece of chocolate could satisfy my cravings. Friends, my cabinets are locked down, my outlets are childproofed, and doors are always closed when rooms aren’t in use. These were precautions I didn’t take with my first two kids. In fact, I might have even rolled my eyes at parents who did! (Guilty as charged.)
I genuinely admire my youngest and his determination to leave his mark on our family. His plan seems to have four key elements:
- Stay awake—like, all the time.
- Create a path of delightful chaos.
- Relocate important objects to top-secret toddler hideouts.
- Never, under any circumstances, let go of the colander!
That last point is crucial. My little guy has a strange love affair with my kitchenware. Forget about kid-sized pots and pans; he turns to the real stuff. So while Tupperware and serving utensils are his Holy Grail of toddler toys, be prepared for a full-on toddler meltdown if you even think about taking that colander away.
Whereas some kids find comfort in a security blanket or a lovey, mine treasures a pasta strainer. It makes sense, I suppose, considering he’s following in a long line of carb enthusiasts.
When he’s not busy striking warrior-like poses with his shiny cookware, you can find him hoarding and stacking any items he can get his hands on—DVDs, princess accessories, or random spices. They turn up in the most unexpected places days or weeks later. Just the other day, while about to toss an old gift box, I discovered my paprika, a pair of sunglasses, my older son’s overdue library book, and some half-eaten crackers all stashed away.
Ask me how many minutes I spend daily searching for the TV remote. Thank you, my son, for helping us reduce our screen time!
So, about that laid-back third child stereotype? Definitely not a reality. He craves to be in the middle of the action, soaking up the chaos, the noise, and the fun from his older siblings. He’s all about the hustle, the bustle, and the never-ending need to be held.
He doesn’t just want to go with the flow; he wants to make a splash. And yet, on those rare occasions, he might just pause long enough for me to locate my keys and wash out that trusty colander.
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In summary, the idea that third children are mellow is a charming myth. They often come with their own unique brand of energy and chaos, eager to engage in the family dynamic. The truth is, they’re just as spirited as their siblings, proving that every child has their own personality and flair.