I documented every significant milestone in my children’s lives—the grand occasions that felt monumental at the time. After all, who wouldn’t want to revisit weddings, baby showers, births, birthdays, and graduation ceremonies again and again?
Recently, I stumbled upon a video of my son’s class performance from twelve years ago. There he was, that adorable seven-year-old, sitting among his classmates, belting out songs and sneaking glances my way to see if I was still watching. His smile lit up the room, and those familiar little movements tugged at my heartstrings.
But suddenly, it hit me—I had captured the wrong moments. While I thought this concert was a highlight worth reliving, I realized it wasn’t the true essence of what I long to remember. The moments I truly cherish were spontaneous, unplanned, and took me by surprise.
I snapped photos of our kids snoozing on the couch, in their car seats, or tucked in their cribs. Yet, I never thought to bring my camera into our bed. If I could make a deal with the universe, I would go back to those mornings when all three of our little ones climbed in beside us. We would drift in and out of sleep, waking to see those tiny arms and legs, snug in their pajamas, sprawled over my husband and me. Those sweet scenes remain etched in my memory, and I wish I could relive them.
My brother’s in-laws own a house with a hill that slopes down from their back porch. One sweltering August day, they covered part of that hill with plastic and turned on the garden hose. My young sons and their cousins gleefully slid down that makeshift waterslide, turning the lawn into a muddy playground, and oh, how they laughed! I’ve never seen them so happy, and I wish I could rewind to that evening, scrubbing layers of mud from their hair as they excitedly told me it was the best day of their lives.
Every year, I took first-day-of-school photos from nursery through high school. Each image captured their eager smiles, fresh haircuts, and shiny new backpacks. But the moment I truly wish I could revisit happened a few weeks into a new school year. My eldest, who had always loved school, climbed into my lap one morning and tearfully said he didn’t think he could go anymore and just wanted to stay with me. In that moment, as he sobbed in my arms, I realized I would trade all those glossy first-day moments for just a few seconds when I was his safest haven.
I must have taken a hundred prom pictures, capturing the transformation of my teenage son from scruffy kid to dapper young man in a tuxedo. But the moment I want to relive isn’t the prom itself; it’s the night he came home late, excitedly sharing how he had gathered his friends to serenade his date into accepting his invitation. It was a rare glimpse into his world, marking a new chapter in our evolving relationship.
I’ve aimed my camera at the wrong moments, mistaking the grand events in my children’s lives as the most precious memories. But parenthood is an ever-evolving journey. Just last night, my husband played soccer with our two teenage boys in the backyard. They were laughing and joking in the waning summer light, and after two decades of motherhood, I finally had the sense to take a moment to breathe in the summer air, soak in the joy of watching them together, and yes, I brought my camera along.
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In summary, while I captured the big moments, I’ve come to realize that the unexpected, everyday moments are often the ones that fill our hearts with the most joy.