Finding Delight in Alternative Paths to Motherhood

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One reason my blog brings me so much joy is that it has expanded my circle of friends tremendously. I met Bella Thompson through our mutual interest in leveraging social media to connect with readers—especially after her first book launched in 2014. In Cool Aunty: The Ultimate Guide for Awesome Aunts, Great-Aunts, Godmothers, and All Women Who Cherish Kids, Bella highlights the profound joy and love that comes from the bonds between “aunties” and their nieces, nephews, godchildren, and beyond. Knowing Bella’s passion for happiness, I was excited to hear her insights.

What’s a simple activity that consistently lifts your spirits?

I love calling my nephews and nieces just to hear their delightful voices. It’s like instant happiness in a phone call!

What’s something you’ve learned about happiness that you wish you knew at 18?

As a teenager, I thought popularity was the key to happiness. Now I realize it’s actually the other way around—true happiness often leads to popularity!

Do you have a happiness mantra or motto that resonates with you?

“Keep going.” My close friend reminds me of this whenever I celebrate a success; there’s always more to achieve if I maintain my positive outlook.

What do you notice in others that contributes to or detracts from their happiness?

I used to focus on what I lacked by my mid-30s (like being a wife or mother) instead of embracing who I really am (like being a loving aunt and a passionate business owner). Once I started viewing myself positively—thinking of myself as “childfull” instead of “childless”—I discovered that happiness is self-defined. You simply need the right mindset to reshape your happiness narrative, especially if life didn’t unfold as planned. This realization inspired me to create CoolAunt.com in 2008 and write Cool Aunty: The Ultimate Guide for Awesome Aunts, Great-Aunts, Godmothers, and All Women Who Cherish Kids. Many women have uncovered their incredible worth as aunts and godmothers, and the vital role they play in children’s lives. This brings me great joy.

Do you actively work on being happier? If so, how?

Absolutely. Every day, I practice letting go of expectations—not giving up on success, but understanding that outcomes aren’t always immediate or clear. If I do something I believe will make me happy and it doesn’t work out, I trust that future happiness will come from unexpected places. Letting go of rigid beliefs about what should make me happy, and instead believing that all efforts can lead to greater joy, is my daily practice. My faith in happiness remains steadfast.

For more insights from Jenna Parker, check out her website.

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Summary:

Finding joy in alternative paths to motherhood can be a fulfilling journey. Embracing different roles, like being an aunt, can redefine happiness. By shifting our perspectives and focusing on the positive aspects of our lives, we can cultivate a sense of joy that resonates deeply, regardless of our circumstances.

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