Updated: Jan. 9, 2023
Originally Published: Dec. 22, 2014
Why do so many people grumble about the holiday season? I have a theory. After 45 years of navigating life filled with disappointments—only to find a more cheerful outlook lately—I’ve stumbled upon a little secret: the key to enjoying the holidays (and life in general) is simple. 1. Lower your expectations. 2. Aside from the usual obligations like paying taxes or obeying traffic laws, only do what you actually want to do.
I often hear friends lamenting their holiday gatherings. They talk about how their mom drowns their kids in sugary treats or how their stepdad can be a real pain. Sure, I don’t face those specific issues, but I still dread going home for the holidays. Why? Honestly, I’m not quite sure. I just prefer visiting when it’s sunny and we can spend time outdoors. Plus, watching my nieces text their friends about their gifts makes me feel old and irritable—no thanks! So if that little voice inside you says you dislike holiday visits, maybe it’s just urging you to skip them altogether.
Another common grievance is the financial strain of gift-giving. The solution? Simply don’t buy gifts! Or at least, don’t feel obligated to give everyone something. Just pick one thoughtful gift for someone special as a gesture of goodwill. For instance, I chose some books for a friend this year—nothing extravagant, but it felt good to share. I told myself, “Great! Christmas shopping is done!”
Of course, this approach doesn’t apply to kids who are old enough to understand presents. It’s far easier to buy them something than to explain why they aren’t getting gifts. But once they grasp the concept of money, it’s okay to be honest. Kids hear enough about needing to study hard to make a living; I’m sure they appreciate a dose of reality just as much as I did at their age.
This “no gift” philosophy applies to holiday parties too. I loathe those office gatherings, so guess what? I’m skipping mine! No excuses necessary; I’m just not going! Whee! (And yes, you can also avoid attending that random holiday party without feeling guilty.)
So what else am I opting out of this holiday season? Honestly, I’m keeping it pretty low-key. I dream of sipping some bourbon and rewatching The Ghost Writer for the fifth time. I know I said to lower your expectations, and you might think that sounds pretty fun, but hey, I’m just being real!
Maybe I’m simple, but I see a few days off during this cozy time of year—when it’s perfectly acceptable to binge-watch TV—as a win. If you’re struggling to reframe the holidays as something to enjoy rather than dread, just repeat the words “The holidays. The holidays. The holidays.” They sound so harmless and generic. Savor them like supermarket eggnog. Mmm, delicious eggnog! Expectations raised!
This article was originally published on Dec. 22, 2014, but the tips are timeless. For more about navigating the complexities of pregnancy and home insemination, check out resources like ACOG and Cryobaby, which can help you on your journey. Also, don’t forget to review our terms and conditions to stay informed.
Summary:
To enjoy the holiday season, it’s essential to lower your expectations and focus on what truly brings you joy. Skip the stress of obligatory gatherings and gift-giving by doing only what feels right for you. Embrace the simple pleasures of the season, and remind yourself that it’s okay to take a break from the holiday hustle.