As I approached the end of my college journey, I observed that nearly all my peers seemed to have their post-graduation plans neatly lined up—except for me. While many of my friends secured jobs before even tossing their caps into the air, I found myself hesitating. I pursued a major in mathematics and philosophy, with the former opening doors to fields like finance and teaching. Yet, none of these paths felt right. Philosophy, despite its depth, didn’t provide the practical direction I needed.
Reflecting back, I realize now that my assumption—that everyone else had it all figured out—was misguided. Catching up with those seemingly well-prepared friends revealed a different story; many were dissatisfied with their jobs. Sure, a select few might know they want to be doctors or lawyers since their teenage years, but they are far from the norm. A large number of people still grapple with their career choices well into their 40s, let alone fresh graduates in their 20s.
Recently, I had the opportunity to return to my alma mater to share my journey—one that included a brief venture into finance, launching a nonprofit, and diving into a Ph.D. program in Behavioral Science (along with writing for Cafe!). This experience got me pondering the valuable lessons I’ve gathered over the years.
1. It’s Completely Normal to Feel Lost.
We often ask kids about their future aspirations without taking their responses seriously, brushing them off as a phase. Yet, when students reach college, the expectation shifts dramatically: they must choose a career path and stick to it. But how can you know what you want to do for the next 40 years if you’ve never held a full-time job? This pressure can lead to significant anxiety. A recent survey showed that concerns about future employment contribute significantly to mental health issues among students. Acknowledging that it’s okay to take time to figure things out could alleviate some of this stress and help prevent impulsive decisions that lead to unsuitable careers.
2. Career Choices Are Not a One-Time Decision.
We often frame career selection as a monumental, one-off choice that dictates the rest of our lives. It’s more productive to view your career as a series of smaller, flexible decisions. Upon graduation, you don’t need to figure out your entire future—just your next few months or years. Of course, some choices, like attending medical school, can lead to deeper commitments, but if you’re unsure, it’s wise to explore various options that keep your future open.
3. You Can’t Know What You’ll Enjoy Until You Give It a Try.
Right after graduation, I applied for a nannying position in London—primarily for the pay and flexibility. However, I didn’t land that gig. Instead, I was offered an internship at a corporate finance firm. Initially skeptical, I took the plunge, thinking I might learn something valuable. While I ultimately decided finance wasn’t my calling, I was surprised by how much I appreciated the work. Conversely, as I pursue my Ph.D., I’m realizing that the solitary nature of it isn’t what I had imagined. Sometimes, our perceptions of a job don’t match reality, and the only way to know is to dive in.
4. Your Early Career is a Phase for Exploration.
It often takes years to uncover what you truly enjoy. However, you can expedite this discovery process by trying out various roles. It’s completely normal to dislike your first job; the key is to gain experience. Spending the initial years in short-term roles or internships across different sectors can help clarify what you value in a job, what drives you, and where your strengths lie. I had initially planned to explore many options, but after my finance internship, I found a role at a nonprofit that truly engaged me, providing a wealth of responsibilities and learning opportunities.
5. Don’t Limit Yourself to Conventional Career Paths.
A friend of mine, who graduated around the same time, was similarly disenchanted with standard career trajectories. He decided to write a book on popular statistics, which unexpectedly became a bestseller. He’s been able to sustain himself through royalties while pursuing various creative projects worldwide. The takeaway? You don’t have to follow the traditional career blueprint. There are numerous ways to earn a living—like tutoring or freelancing—that allow you to focus on what you’re passionate about, whether that’s honing new skills, creating art, or even launching your own business.
The common thread here is to embrace your 20s as a learning experience: discover who you are, what you enjoy, and what skills you can acquire. Allow yourself a few years of exploration before feeling pressured to commit to a lifelong path.