Both ancient philosophers and contemporary scientists agree: strong connections with others are crucial for our happiness. Among the various relationships that enrich our lives, friendships hold a particularly significant place. My personal journey toward happier friendships includes resolutions like “Be more forgiving,” “Make a point to show up,” “Connect with three new friends,” “Encourage social gatherings,” “Remember special dates,” “Avoid gossip,” and “Greet everyone I meet.” Here are eight psychological concepts that have helped me enhance and deepen my friendships.
Triadic Closure
“Triadic closure” is a fascinating concept where individuals often forge friendships with the friends of their friends, creating a comforting sense of community. This interconnectedness is invigorating! I’ve made a conscious effort to help my friends connect with each other and to befriend those in their circles. (Pardon the slightly clunky phrasing: “befriend friends’ friends” is a mouthful!)
Emotional Contagion
“Emotional contagion” refers to the phenomenon where we absorb the feelings of those around us. A cheerful friend can uplift the mood of the group, while a grumpy one can spread negativity. I’m working on holding up my end of the emotional bargain by striving to be more positive.
The Mere Exposure Effect
Familiarity leads to fondness, a principle known as the “mere exposure effect.” Repeated interactions with someone can increase your affection for them. So, I try to place myself in settings where I regularly encounter the same people.
Fundamental Attribution Error
This psychological bias causes us to misinterpret others’ actions as reflections of their personalities rather than considering external factors. For example, if someone rushes past me in a store, I might think they’re rude, overlooking the fact that they could be hurrying to get medication for a sick loved one.
Warmth
Reciprocal attraction is a real thing: we tend to like people who show us warmth. When I approach someone with friendliness and enthusiasm, they often respond in kind. I’ve learned to be more openly warm instead of playing it cool.
Smiling
It may seem simple, but smiling genuinely increases how friendly people perceive us! Studies show that the more we smile, along with other expressive gestures, the more approachable we appear.
Subliminal Touching
Research indicates that subtle, unnoticed touches can enhance feelings of well-being and connection between people. A light touch on the back or arm can create a positive atmosphere without even being conscious of it.
Situation Evocation
In this concept, our behavior influences how others react to us. If I adopt a cheerful demeanor, I’m more likely to evoke smiles and laughter from those around me. In essence, I get to create my own emotional “weather.”
Many folks think that friendships should come naturally and that putting in effort feels forced or artificial. However, life can get busy, and we might forget to prioritize what truly matters. Since committing to my friendship resolutions, I’ve noticed my connections expanding and deepening. It’s absolutely worth the time and effort!
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In summary, nurturing friendships through psychology involves understanding and implementing these principles to create deeper, more fulfilling connections. By being mindful, we can foster a supportive social network that enhances our happiness.