Ah, modern etiquette, where manners seem to be plummeting faster than a toddler’s tantrum in a toy store. Blame it on smartphones, social media, or the fact that Millennials seem glued to their devices.
During our last gathering, we sent out invitations to 30 guests. Only two responded right away to decline (out of town, lucky them). Of the remaining 28, 13 decided to let us know just a day before the event that they were in, while four piped up to say they wouldn’t make it. Then, there were the four who texted on the morning of the bash: “Yes!”—how lovely of them. One even messaged during the party to announce, “Hey, I think I’ll skip this one,” as if he were trying to escape a secret lair. And the rest? Total radio silence. Maybe they’ve joined a witness protection program.
This whole situation drives me nuts! Preparing for a party is no small feat. I scrub the house, hide all my embarrassing prescriptions (which I can never find when I need them), and make sure everything is spotless—even the shower curtain, which is often decorated with remnants of toddler chocolate smudges.
But the biggest headache? The food. I’ve ended up with entire hams left over, and let’s not even talk about the excess of frosted Christmas cookies. I’ve run out of snacks within the first hour because suddenly, everyone who swore they were busy decided to come after all. I guess this is just how the world works now—like a surprise flash mob!
So What’s a Host to Do?
We still love having people over, even if they’re unsure if they can commit to a Saturday on a Tuesday. (Confession: I’m guilty of this too!) But wouldn’t it be nice to know who plans to show up? The saddest sight is a lonely turducken, devoured over nine consecutive dinners.
To navigate this RSVP chaos, I reached out to Nora Evans, a talented chef and author of The Endless Meal. She’s a pro at throwing parties and embodies the easy-going vibe that someone like me—who tends to be overly uptight about etiquette—should definitely channel.
I asked her for some tips on managing this modern RSVP dilemma. “First off,” she said, “try to boost your RSVP rates. I get great responses because I hype up my parties! Use vibrant, enticing invitations that make it sound like there’s going to be an epic event. Raise the stakes, get people curious—maybe mention that there will be dancing bears or something equally ridiculous!”
Okay, I can do that—maybe. But what about the food prep? How do I avoid that dreaded leftover turducken scenario?
“Out with the fancy fish dishes, and in with the sausages!” she advised. “My dinner parties used to be elaborate, but now I focus on easy-to-prepare meals. If your guest list expands at the last minute, have some quick-fix items on hand. Braised dishes or charcuterie boards are perfect—they can be frozen if needed.”
So, noted: keep sausages and other finger foods on standby. I could even have a pulled-pork extravaganza if things get out of hand!
Coping with Last-Minute RSVPs
Finally, I asked Nora how to cope with the emotional rollercoaster that comes with last-minute RSVPs. With a gentle smile, she said, “If you can’t handle the last-minute changes, you might want to take a step back—life’s little bumps shouldn’t derail your happiness. If you embrace the chaos, others might just follow your lead.”
In conclusion, while the art of RSVPing may be slipping away, adapting to this new norm can make hosting less stressful and more enjoyable. After all, it’s all about good company and creating memories, right?
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