Everything I Discovered About Writing a Book… The Tough Way

Parenting Insights

Updated: Feb. 8, 2016
Originally Published: June 14, 2014

Lately, I’ve been inundated with queries about the book writing journey, so I thought it would be helpful to share everything I’ve learned for those who might be curious. While I can’t say I know every detail about the publishing world, I’ve certainly gained a wealth of knowledge over the years. For instance, I was fortunate that my agent reached out to me, so I can’t offer guidance on finding one. However, I can share my experiences regarding the book writing process.

Releasing a book is oddly reminiscent of having a baby. It’s a mix of pain, exhaustion, excitement, and ultimately, a blur once it’s all done. The moment you hold that finished product in your hands, all the effort feels worthwhile. But the journey to that moment is far from easy, and anyone who says otherwise is not telling the truth. Here’s what I wish I had known.

The Book Proposal

When it comes to fiction, having a complete manuscript is essential for securing an agent or a book deal. This means you need to write an entire book before you can sell it, which can feel daunting. For non-fiction, however, a solid proposal usually suffices, especially if you have a blog that showcases your writing style.

If you’re like me and haven’t created an outline since high school, crafting a proposal might feel intimidating, yet it’s quite straightforward. Here are the key components to include:

What is your book about, and why are you writing it?
Who are you? This acts as your professional resume.
Identify your audience. Use tools like Google and Facebook Analytics to understand who your readers are.
Outline your social presence. Include links to your blog, Facebook, Twitter, and any other platforms.
List any press or publications. Mention any writing credits or awards.
Provide a chapter outline. The more detailed, the better; it reduces your workload later.
Sample content. Offer 4-5 chapters that are as polished as possible.
Add visuals. Being a graphic designer helped me here, but visual elements can enhance any proposal.
Include hyperlinks. Make it easy for people to navigate to your work online.
Have a few people review it. Fresh eyes can catch typos and offer valuable feedback.

The Publishing Industry

My experiences with publishing, particularly with my books “Confessions of a Mom” and “Motherhood Unplugged,” were through a well-known publisher. After my agent submitted my proposal, Simon & Schuster made me an offer. A bidding war would have been thrilling, but honestly, one good offer is all you need.

Many ask if having an agent is necessary, and I believe it is crucial. You want someone knowledgeable in your corner, especially if you’re not self-publishing. While the self-publishing route has gained popularity, especially among bloggers with established audiences, it also means you forego the benefits of a publisher’s support.

Here are some valuable insights I gained from working with a major publisher:

Connection with your editor matters. Your editor will guide you through the production phase, so it’s essential to have a good rapport.
You are responsible for selling your book. Publishers will help, but they rely on you to connect with your audience. Even with a large following, translating that into sales can be tricky.
Stay authentic. Publishers aim to sell books, which can lead to conflicts over marketing choices. Trust your instincts and create what feels right for you.
You’re your book’s biggest advocate. No one else will care as much about your book as you do, so take charge of its promotion.

Writing the Book

Writing a book is vastly different from blogging. The immediate gratification of blog comments and the freedom to post whenever you like are absent in book writing. Here are some tips to navigate this challenge:

Capture inspiration when it strikes. Ideas can come in waves, so write them down immediately, even if it means sacrificing sleep.
Seek inspiration. Look through parenting books to identify gaps or areas you can improve upon. Magazines can also spark ideas.
Reflect on your blog content. Use your existing material as a springboard for deeper exploration.
Always back up your work. I learned this the hard way after losing chapters I couldn’t replicate.

Marketing and Promoting Your Book

If you publish traditionally, you’ll likely collaborate with a marketing team. If you self-publish, the burden of promotion falls entirely on you. Regardless, supplementing the publisher’s efforts is usually wise. Here are a few strategies:

Offer pre-order incentives. I provided signed bookplates for pre-orders, which were cost-effective and well-received.
Provide a free sample. Sharing the first two chapters can entice readers to purchase the rest.
Give away copies. I distributed my book to several blogging friends, which led to organic word-of-mouth promotion.
Engage in radio interviews. They’re convenient and can yield high returns in terms of exposure.
Utilize your community. Involve friends and family; they can help spread the word.
Host a celebration. Whether large or small, a party can generate excitement around your book.
Promote without being annoying. Striking the right balance is key to maintain goodwill.

TV Appearances

I was fortunate to have local TV exposure before tackling national interviews, which helped ease my nerves. Here are some takeaways from that experience:

Dress appropriately. Your outfit should be flattering yet not distracting. Avoid overly busy patterns.
Choose comfort. Ensure your clothes allow you to focus on the interview instead of fidgeting.
Practice your sitting posture. How you look while seated can differ significantly from standing.
Wear heels. They can elevate your presence, especially when sitting.
Accept professional help. Take advantage of hair and makeup services offered.
Focus on the interviewer. Engage with them rather than the camera.
Avoid fidgeting. It can be distracting to viewers.
Stay on message. Know what you want to communicate and practice saying it effectively.
Maintain good posture. Posture matters, especially on camera.
Smile. A smile can create a friendly impression, even if it feels silly.

Personal Appearances

Unless you’re a well-known figure, traditional book tours are becoming less effective. Connecting with your audience is still valuable, so consider how to best engage them.

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Summary

In essence, writing a book is a complex, often challenging endeavor that involves substantial preparation, marketing, and personal engagement. Each step, from crafting a proposal to promoting your work, requires dedication and authenticity. Embracing your unique voice and building a supportive community can make the journey more rewarding.