November is a time for indulging in pumpkin pie and navigating the chaos of Black Friday shopping. It’s also National Adoption Month, a time when we celebrate families coming together and express our gratitude. For me, this month holds extra significance as two of my kids are adopted, and adoption has always been a part of my family story.
As an adoptive parent, I often find myself on the receiving end of intrusive questions about adoption. While I usually respond politely and steer the conversation away, there are some answers I wish I could give. Here’s a light-hearted take on how I would respond to those nosy inquiries:
- Can’t you have any children of your own? Nope! My uterus is out of commission, and my fallopian tubes are basically non-existent. Thanks to endometriosis, I had a few parts removed. Interested in a detailed conversation about my lady bits? Because I can go on.
- What happened to their real mom? Well, I’m not sure who you’re referring to, but these little ones just woke me up at 5 AM demanding oatmeal and cartoons. Seems pretty real to me! By the way, are those your real teeth?
- How much did they cost? They were free, but the shipping and handling were a nightmare! Speaking of costs, how much did you shell out for that gigantic SUV parked outside?
- Do you know Angelina Jolie? Absolutely! Just yesterday, I texted her: “Hey Angie, let’s grab some happy hour drinks after we finish our yoga session.” Of course, I know people who have adopted; we all gather for wine and cheese dip!
- Why did you adopt from China instead of your own country? I adopted from my own species, thank you very much! Also, when are we discussing the origins of your shoes from Indonesia or your Japanese car?
- Now that you’ve adopted, do you think you’ll get pregnant? Oh joy, more vagina talk! Just see my first answer.
- Are you planning to tell them they’re adopted? It depends on how clever they turn out to be! If they start piecing things together around age 13, we’ll have the chat then. Perfect timing for a little teen drama, right?
- You’re a saint for giving those poor children a good home. You bet I am! But I really need to go now, the kids are demanding my attention and probably my beer too.
Adoption brings a unique set of joys and challenges, and it’s important to have supportive resources. If you’re navigating similar experiences, consider checking out this excellent resource for pregnancy and home insemination at NICHD. And if you’re looking for ways to boost fertility, Make a Mom offers great insights. Also, for more tips on home insemination, you can visit our other blog post here.
In summary, while the questions about adoption can often be nosy or rude, they also provide an opportunity to inject humor and assert our family’s unique story. Embracing the journey of adoption is both a privilege and a joy, and it’s important to handle it with grace and a bit of wit.