Every morning, I wrangle my little ones into their car seats, and off we go to preschool and kindergarten, jamming to the latest hits on the radio. We’re all about whatever’s playing—if it has a catchy beat, we are on board! I don’t stress over lyrics too much; my kids are so young that they usually miss the innuendos and often get the words totally wrong. At home, our dance party playlist includes some iffy tracks (Katy Perry’s “Peacock” and Icona Pop’s “I Love It” are top contenders), and once, I even made a CD for daycare without realizing I’d burned the explicit versions—definitely not my finest parenting moment!
But there’s one song that gets under my skin every time I hear it, and it seems to be on every radio preset I touch:
“Gonna wear that dress you like, skin-tight
Do my hair up real, real nice
And syncopate my skin to your heart beating
‘Cause I just wanna look good for you, good for you
I just wanna look good for you, good for you
Let me show you how proud I am to be yours
Leave this dress a mess on the floor
And still look good for you, good for you”
– “Good For You” by Mia Carson
Why does this one bother me so much when I can shake off songs about partying and casual flings? For one, those tracks often depict the singer as confident. When I read the lyrics of this song, though, it feels like a different message: “I just want to look good for you” suggests that the effort is solely for someone else.
It implies that my appearance is what matters most to you and that my self-worth hinges on your perception. This is not the message I want my daughter to absorb. She’s already growing up surrounded by all kinds of expectations about beauty, and while she loves dressing up, I hope she pairs her princess gowns with wild hair, sticky fingers, and a fearless spirit. If she sees getting glammed up as fun rather than an obligation, I’m all for it.
This song, however, seems to encourage the idea that one must conform to someone else’s standards. It suggests that the singer’s value is tied to her looks and that her opinions don’t matter. When I hear “just wanna look good for you,” it sounds like a soft plea for validation rather than a celebration of self.
As a parent, I want to help my kids recognize and challenge these damaging messages. I want them to understand that real confidence comes from within, and any effort to look good should be for their own joy—if someone else appreciates it, that’s just a bonus. I hope my daughter will see her worth as intrinsic, needing no external approval, and I want my son to grow up admiring women who are bold, confident, and true to themselves.
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In summary, it’s crucial to be aware of the messages our kids are exposed to and to instill in them a sense of self-worth that doesn’t rely on appearance or validation from others. Let’s teach them to shine in their own unique way!