Parenting can leave you feeling utterly drained, and I’m living proof of that. Last night was a real doozy—I managed to sleep in my king-sized bed, the top bunk of a bunk bed, on a twin-sized bottom bunk, and even on the floor next to the crib, resting my head on a Boppy pillow. All of this occurred between 10 PM and 6:30 AM. That’s a serious marathon of exhaustion!
I’m so worn out that I leave imprints on our hardwood floors from my late-night pacing. Honestly, I should invest in a pedometer; I bet I burn more calories wandering around the house at night than I do during the day. Forget that—I’m positive I do since I’m constantly up and down for breastfeeding.
My poor dog has even given up sleeping in my bedroom. He’s not nocturnal and needs his beauty sleep! The other day, I mixed orange juice into my coffee—yes, that’s how tired I am. And don’t get me started on my morning routine; I squeezed tinted moisturizer onto my toothbrush instead of my face cream.
I’m so out of it that I’ve put my pants on inside out and only noticed when I got to Pure Barre, where the other women shot me puzzled looks. I had to make a quick escape to the restroom to rectify my fashion faux pas.
I’ve even searched for my keys in the freezer, where I’ve found them before after unloading groceries. I can’t even recall the last time I had a full night of sleep without interruptions—it’s been more than two years, I’m sure. I’m practically a milk factory for my nine-month-old, and I’ve googled “baby sleep” more times than I can count, probably over a thousand in the last nine months.
When I see comments from other parents claiming their babies slept through the night at six weeks old because of a “nighttime routine,” I can’t help but feel a mix of envy and frustration. And social media? It’s a minefield; I see friends celebrating their little ones’ sleep victories, blissfully unaware of the sleepless nights many of us endure.
I own a small library of sleep books, yet I still struggle. Just the other day, I thought I might have accidentally scraped a parked car while three kids screamed in the back of my van. I was in a rush and heavy traffic, so I didn’t have a chance to stop. When I returned to check, the car was gone. I even went to the police station to confess my potential mishap, and the officer simply told me to go home and take a nap—apparently, I looked like I needed it!
With the baby on my hip, I explained to the officer that I drive a minivan which has a knack for bumping into things. I even joked about how my husband has had issues with the trash cans too!
One day, I spent ages trying to park my minivan next to the curb on an empty street, but the simplest of tasks became a comedy of errors, all while a construction worker watched my failed attempts. After several tries, I opted to drive around the corner to avoid further embarrassment. It’s as if my parking skills vanished after giving birth to three kids!
Making small talk is like navigating a minefield; I often say something awkward and only realize it after the fact. Just yesterday, a teacher complimented my daughter’s cute pink Converse sneakers, and I mistakenly blurted out, “Oh, her husband is obsessed with shoes.” I meant my husband, of course!
Even though I’m not a huge candy person, I find myself shoving chocolate chips or leftover Halloween candy into my mouth just to get through the day. I recognize that I’ve done this to myself—having three little ones under five means at least one will be up at night, and often more. If I’m up multiple times with the baby and my three-year-old, that adds up to a whole lot of sleepless nights.
I now fully understand the term “bone tired.” I ache in ways I didn’t know were possible, and I finally see why sleep deprivation is considered a form of torture. I’m at the point where I seriously need to implement some sleep training for the baby, and fast!
For more on this journey and other similar topics, check out this resource on pregnancy and home insemination. And if you’re curious about home insemination kits, Make a Mom has you covered.
In summary, motherhood is an exhausting adventure filled with sleepless nights and hilarious blunders. But through the chaos, we find moments of joy and resilience that keep us going—after all, we’re in this together!