I’m done. I’m officially resigning from the marathon that is competitive parenting. Yes, I know it’s important to teach our kids about perseverance. When they want to ditch soccer after we convinced them to join, we make them tough it out. Or when they’re ready to quit tae kwon do right after we splurged on gear, we urge them to see it through. But honestly, I can’t keep up with the high-stakes game of parenting anymore. It’s exhausting, and I’m definitely trailing behind.
From the very beginning, I felt outpaced. I struggled with postpartum blues, chose not to breastfeed, and let my little ones cry it out (while I did a fair bit of crying myself). I served whole milk before they turned one, skipped baby sign language, and let them snack on sugary yogurt and fruit snacks (which, let’s be honest, are pretty much toddler candy). My first child’s baby book is a chaotic mix of random milestones, while my second doesn’t even have one. As they grow, I feel even more out of the loop. Everyone else seems to have it all together, while I’m simply trying to catch my breath.
Here are just a few reasons I’ve decided to step back from this parenting race:
- Concert Attire: My oldest had a holiday concert at preschool where all the kids were dressed to impress. My son, however, sported a t-shirt that read “Monkey Trouble.” But hey, at least he dressed himself, right?
- Dinner Time: Our meals are a constant cycle of fluorescent mac & cheese, peanut butter & jelly sandwiches, and pizza. Sure, baby carrots and apple slices show up occasionally, but they’re not guaranteed.
- Fashion Fails: If my husband comes home and I’m not in pajamas or yoga pants, he thinks he’s missed something significant. My boys? They’d rather wear t-shirts and running pants—definitely not a fashion statement.
- Sports Enthusiasm: I cheer occasionally, but mostly, I’m just a spectator on the sidelines. I don’t make banners or shout from across the field. Just getting my son to practice 3-4 times a week feels like a win to me.
- Halloween Costumes: While Pinterest is overflowing with creative Halloween ideas, my kids often end up in last-minute store-bought costumes. And the second child usually wears a hand-me-down from his older brother.
- Treats for School: Forget about gluten-free, vegan, low-fat cakes. If I manage to bring treats (which is a big if), they’re often sugary store-bought goodies that kids adore.
- Art Projects: I appreciate the effort behind preschool art, but after a while, the mountain of glitter and glue just becomes too much. A lot of their projects end up recycled.
- Volunteering: I had grand plans to be involved in my son’s kindergarten class. After coordinating one Halloween party that didn’t measure up to others, I learned my lesson the hard way.
- Outings: My grand adventures with the kids consist of trips to Target or bike rides. Kudos to the parents who tackle museums and restaurants; I can barely manage the local library.
- Playground Politics: The playground feels like high school all over again. I’m not one for small talk with other parents; instead, you’ll find me on a bench, catching my breath and scrolling through my phone.
So there you have it—ten reasons why I feel like I’m falling short in the race of competitive parenting. I’m tapping out. To those of you still in the game, kudos! But to my fellow weary parents, come join me on this quiet bench in the shade. We can share a knowing smile, admire our amazing kids, and maybe even sneak a peek at our phones.
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In summary, navigating parenting can feel like a never-ending competition, but it’s okay to step back and focus on what truly matters: enjoying the journey, however imperfect it may be.