In the realm of relationship advice, one infamous piece from 2008, “Marry Him! The Case for Settling for Mr. Good Enough,” by Lori Gottlieb, has continued to provoke heated discussions for years. The comments section of this article has morphed into a strange creature, rife with outdated ideas and a splash of sexism, where the notion of women “settling” has led to a cascade of unsolicited opinions.
Take, for instance, a commenter named MikeTheTruthSeeker. He boldly states, “In my experience, many women hold unrealistic expectations of men. They often think too highly of themselves. I mean, how many women call themselves stunning when they’re really just average?” Clearly, Mike has taken it upon himself to judge the worth of women, completely disregarding their own feelings about their attractiveness!
Then there’s another chap, LonelyGuy42, who laments his dating woes, claiming, “I just can’t find a woman who’s a solid 7 or 8. They all seem to expect a guy who is both handsome and brilliant.” His quest for the “perfect” partner seems to be hindered by the very women he criticizes for having high standards.
Another gem comes from a frustrated commenter named Doug. He reflects on a past girlfriend, asserting, “Women have a skewed sense of reality. They think they can hold out for someone better, but they need to compromise more as they age.” Here, Doug seems to suggest that women should lower their standards for the sake of finding a partner, as if life’s worth is solely measured by marital status.
The commentary continues with suggestions like “negging,” a tactic to undermine a person’s confidence to gain their interest. This advice, offered by a user named HelpMeOutBro, implies that the solution to finding love lies in manipulation rather than genuine connection.
As the thread progresses, the tone becomes increasingly disheartening. A woman, Sarah, bravely shares her story about leaving a man who wanted her to settle for less. “I’m 40 and have no regrets. I refuse to compromise my happiness for someone who doesn’t appreciate my passions,” she states, showcasing a refreshing defiance against societal pressures.
In contrast, MikeTheTruthSeeker responds, “It’s no wonder you’re alone. Who would want to be with someone who thinks they’re better than everyone else?” This dual message of condemning women for having standards while simultaneously wondering why they are single is a perplexing phenomenon.
Interestingly, the comments reflect a broader societal struggle. As women navigate their choices—whether to pursue a relationship or remain single—they seem to face criticism no matter the path they take. Have a child on your own? Selfish. Settle for a partner you don’t love? Deceitful. Choose to stay unmarried? Clearly, there’s something wrong.
If you’re curious about exploring your options for starting a family, check out this excellent resource on pregnancy that covers a range of topics, including self-insemination. For those interested in boosting fertility, Make a Mom offers valuable supplements to support your journey.
In summary, the discussion surrounding women settling for partners reveals deep-seated biases and societal expectations that continue to pressure women into conforming to traditional roles. While some choose to embrace their independence, others face scrutiny for their choices. It’s a complex landscape where every decision seems to come with a side of judgment.