Some days, I manage to be a reasonably good parent. Other days? Well, let’s just say I’m grateful I was allowed to leave the hospital with my little ones—four times. Today was one of those latter days.
It’s been eons since I last tackled the task of changing sheets and making beds—probably since the last ice age. Let’s see: one queen-size bed, two sets of bunk beds, and a crib. That’s 2 + 4 (carry the 5) plus 500 stuffed animals and 15 stray socks lurking where the sheets meet the mattress. It’s a lot of bedding, folks!
I’d rather dodge this chore than avoid a workout or a volunteer meeting. I was just adding the finishing touches to my three-year-old’s bottom bunk when my eight-year-old piped up, “Mom, can you make my bed too?”
“Of course, sweetie! Yours is next!” I replied, feeling quite proud of myself for a whole three minutes… until I attempted my ascent to the top bunk, which felt more like scaling Mount Everest. The ladder seemed to mock me, “Look, the big one is trying to climb us! She can’t even figure it out. Seriously, she’s going to slip again.”
When I finally reached the top, you wouldn’t believe my shock. It was like entering a prison cell! No sheets—just 15 books crammed under her pillow, and the “mattress”? A toddler bed pad split into three sections. Thin as a pancake and oh my goodness, I’m the worst.
“Ummm, why don’t you have any sheets? How long has it been like this?” I asked.
“I don’t know. A while, I think,” she replied nonchalantly.
“Why are you sleeping on those flimsy pads?” I continued, bewildered.
“I think something happened when you were fixing the beds last time. I think you couldn’t finish? I don’t know. It was a while ago.”
Her memoir, “I Don’t Remember. It Was a While Ago,” is bound to be a bestseller. NO MORE SHEETS. EVER! The only thing missing was a metal cup for her to rattle against the bed guard.
But wait, it gets even better! The unused top bunk of my son’s bed was decked out like a five-star hotel, complete with a double mattress, an eggshell topper, sheets, two pillows, and enough blankets for an invisible guest to enjoy a luxurious night’s sleep.
I spent the next two hours hauling mattresses, fluffing pillows, and rearranging bedding. I tucked corners and adorned Cinderella’s bed with the softest sheets I could find. How did I let this slide for weeks cough…months? Right, the ladder. That thing is the enemy.
As I placed goodnight kisses at the bottom of the bed, I couldn’t help but reflect—nobody puts baby in a corner unless it’s the corner of an unmade prison cot bunk bed.
On the bright side, I walked away with a newfound admiration for my daughter. She’s the total opposite of a diva. Not once did she complain about the lack of sheets or the unkempt state of her bed. She simply kissed us goodnight and climbed up to her bare wasteland of a mattress.
The old tale says a princess would feel a pea under countless mattresses, but I’m convinced a real princess would do just what my daughter did—smile, kiss her family, and make the best of a situation.
So here’s to my little princess! If she ever marries royalty, we could all use some Egyptian cotton up in here.
For more insights on parenting and home insemination, check out our other posts about it on this page. Also, if you’re looking for expert advice on artificial insemination, visit this site. And for additional resources about pregnancy and home insemination, IVF Babble is an excellent choice.
Summary:
Navigating parenting can sometimes feel overwhelming, particularly when it comes to managing household chores like making beds. In this lighthearted account, the author humorously recounts her struggles with keeping her children’s beds in order, highlighting the resilience and adaptability of her daughter. Through this experience, she discovers a newfound appreciation for her child’s ability to thrive even in less-than-ideal circumstances.