Updated: Jan. 25, 2023
Originally Published: Jan. 25, 2021
There’s a cozy chaos in my bed—two adults, two kids, and two dogs. Just a sliver of the comforter is keeping me warm, and it’s poking me right in the eye. I twist my wrapped-up body to sneak a peek at the clock. 6:18 AM. Time to rise and shine, I suppose.
But then I glance over at the twins, sprawled across the mattress between my husband and me, and I can’t tear my eyes away. When did they grow into such tall little beings? Their eyes closed, I can still see those cherubic baby faces, once snugly swaddled in their little burrito-blankets. Oh, how I adore them!
And then, just like that, they wake up.
And thus begins the daily battle.
It’s a near-daily ritual: the clothing conflict. Today, one of them insists on throwing her pajamas in the dirty clothes bin, while I’m keen on saving them for a cozy repeat tonight. Cue the tears and the dramatic screams. I find myself putting her in time-out, stark naked, feeling like the world’s worst mom.
Then, the twins decide it’s playtime and, as soon as the 2-year-old enters their room, they push her down, causing her to wail. I’m juggling comfort and discipline simultaneously, but they refuse to apologize. One of them bolts away, slips on the hardwood floor, and bonks her head. Now there are three crying kids, and I’m still in my PJs. This parenting gig is hard!
After breakfast, they start whining for TV time. But it’s a perfect day outside, and all I want is to get them playing outdoors instead of glued to the screen. As I tidy up the kitchen, I firmly say “no” to TV. Suddenly, one of the twins shouts, “Well, I’ll just sit on the couch and wait for Daniel Tiger FOREVER!!!”
I threaten them with time-out and the possibility of no TV ever again, but they’ve started bickering with each other, completely ignoring me. They’re at each other’s throats over whether Olaf or Kristoff is the 2-year-old’s favorite Frozen character. When she chimes in with her love for Sven, they yell, “No you DON’T!” and off she goes into another fit of tears.
They’re not just unkind to each other; they’re disrespectful to me too. It’s a total meltdown, and I feel like a terrible mother.
They fight me on everything—going outside, coming back in, lunchtime, naptime, and of course, dinnertime. Is it too much to ask for a smooth operation just once? I detest conflict; it makes me squirmy and anxious. Before kids, I was a master at avoiding it, but now, as a parent, I have no choice. I refuse to be the mom who can’t say “no,” which means my days are filled with constant tussles.
It’s exhausting, truly.
Bedtime is often the worst of it. They resist heading upstairs, argue about who gets to use the bathroom first, and demand different pajamas at the most inconvenient times. They want to race around with toothbrushes and insist on reading the longest book in the house to me—twice—because they are twins after all.
Yet, when it’s ten at night, and they’re still awake, begging to sleep in Mommy and Daddy’s bed, I find myself saying yes. It’s not exactly romantic, but I cherish these moments. They won’t always be this little, and one day, they won’t want to cuddle with us anymore.
The struggle is real, but when I offer half of my pillow to my daughter and she whispers that she loves me, all the battles seem worth it. I know tomorrow brings a fresh round of challenges. My body aches just thinking about it. But for now, the house is quiet, the girls are sleeping soundly, and they smell like strawberry shampoo. In this moment, I feel like a good mom.
At least until they wake up.
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Summary:
Parenting is a daily struggle filled with chaos, conflict, and sweet moments. From morning battles over getting dressed to bedtime negotiations, the challenges can feel overwhelming. Despite the exhaustion, cherishing the quiet moments with your children makes it all worthwhile.