As I approach the big 5-0, I’ve been reflecting on my life and all its twists and turns. You see, in the blogging realm, there’s a trend of capturing significant life moments with titles like “This is Childhood” or “This is 39.” They freeze time, allowing us to explore the beauty and messiness of each age. So, what does turning 48 mean for me?
Nostalgia
Nostalgia is the first word that comes to mind. I often find myself reminiscing about the days when I could easily scoop up my son, now a towering young man, and assure him everything would be okay. I think back to when all four of my kids were under one roof, creating chaos and joy. It takes me back to a simpler childhood, where we played kick the can until the streetlights flickered on, and the world was a much less connected place—no smartphones, no social media, just vinyl records, and the thrill of Saturday morning cartoons.
Cover-Up
Cover-Up is another theme that resonates. I can’t help but notice the women around me tightening, plumping, and nipping away imperfections. I find myself questioning whether I should join the fray, spending too many dollars on “age-defying” products specifically targeting my demographic. It’s a bit of a losing battle, as I realize that no amount of yoga or kale will stop the inevitable passage of time—youth is slipping away, and there’s no reversing that tide.
Searching
Searching is also a big part of this stage in my life. I’m on a quest for meaning—my roots, spirituality, and my identity. Recently, I’ve been studying with a rabbi and exploring different aspects of Judaism. It’s a journey that’s made me ponder my roles as a woman, mother, and friend.
Disorientation
Disorientation has become a constant companion. With kids spanning from college to grade school, my days are a whirlwind of playdates and college graduation parties. I find it surreal that my oldest will graduate college just as my youngest celebrates her Bat Mitzvah. It’s a vivid reminder that time is relentless, and my high school reunion is just around the corner, bringing back memories that feel like they happened yesterday.
Uncertainty
Then there’s Uncertainty. Did I make the right choice leaving my career to stay home? Should I return to work? I find myself pondering decisions both big and small, questioning why life can be so unfair at times. The future feels daunting, particularly the thought of becoming an empty nester and facing my own aging process.
Perimenopause
Perimenopause has thrown me for a loop—think of it as a rollercoaster ride of emotions. One moment I’m tearful, the next I can’t remember why I just walked into a room. It’s exhausting, and while I’ve considered the allure of medication, I often choose to lean on my writing group, yoga, and the occasional therapy session.
Work
Work is another piece of the puzzle. I write, teach yoga, and engage in community service—activities that are fulfilling yet not exactly lucrative. My husband works tirelessly to support our family while I ensure our home runs somewhat smoothly, which is an ongoing challenge.
Letting Go
Letting Go has become essential. I’m learning to accept that I may never become a bestselling author or a renowned public relations expert. Instead, I’m focusing on embracing who I am right now, as my kids grow into their own lives, and I have to relinquish control over their outcomes.
Transition
It’s a Transition—moving from youthful exuberance to a more seasoned perspective. I’m navigating the challenges of caring for aging parents and my own aging process, which has taught me patience and compassion.
Gratitude
Through it all, there’s Gratitude for my life and the people who fill it. I’m thankful for my husband and the health of my loved ones. After years of sleepless nights and parenting challenges, I can now offer wisdom to younger moms.
Acceptance
Acceptance has also started to settle in—accepting my scars, my flaws, and the chaos of life around me. It’s about finding compassion for myself and those I love, recognizing that life can be both painful and beautiful.
Freedom
Freedom is a newfound concept. I’m learning to invest my energy into what truly matters and let go of relationships that drain me. It’s a time for self-care and for speaking my truth, both written and spoken.
The Moment
Finally, it’s about the Moment—slowing down to appreciate where I am right now. I’m learning to truly see and listen to my children, to cherish every precious moment instead of rushing to the next chapter.
Love
And of course, it’s all about Love. Love for my husband, for my incredible children, and for the lessons that life continues to teach me. Each day is a gift, and I’m learning to unwrap it with care.
This is my 48—a journey of highs and lows, reflections and revelations. If you’re interested in learning more about family-building options, check out this excellent resource at Resolve.
For more insights on home insemination, you might want to explore this post to keep the conversation going.
Summary
Turning 48 brings a mix of nostalgia, uncertainty, and gratitude. It’s a time for reflection on life’s transitions, acceptance of imperfections, and the freedom to embrace love and meaningful connections. As I navigate this stage, I’m learning to cherish each moment.