Ah, autumn! The leaves will soon be turning, and there’s a chill in the air, along with football games, apple cider, and pumpkins. For parents of high school seniors, it’s also the time for college applications.
Nothing can quite match the stress and anxiety of watching your child navigate the college application process. I remember spending long hours refreshing websites to calculate my kids’ chances of getting into their dream schools (which often felt like a long shot).
Now that some time has passed since my children went through this phase, I look back on my own experiences and cringe at how I handled it. The reality hit me hard: despite my 20 years as a stay-at-home mom, there was little I could do to influence their college admissions. Here’s what I learned (with a touch of humor) and how to keep your sanity intact during those rollercoaster months leading up to acceptance letters.
1. Let Them Own the Application
Resist the urge to fill out any part of your child’s application. Even if you have to sit beside them for hours, let your child do the work. Remember, it’s their name on the application, not yours!
2. Respect Their Privacy
Do not keep track of usernames and passwords for their applications. This is their journey—let them handle it. Checking their admission status without them? Just don’t go there.
3. Encourage Exploration
If your child decides to focus solely on one university because of the popularity of its students, gently nudge them to keep exploring other options. There are plenty of great schools out there!
4. Skip the Essay Reviews
Even if you were an English whiz in college, resist the temptation to critique your child’s essays. If they need help, suggest they seek a different opinion, perhaps from a teacher or tutor.
5. Plan Financially Ahead
Don’t wait until the last minute to discuss your family’s financial situation. It’s tempting to promise unlimited options, but raiding your retirement fund for a pricey private school isn’t wise. Explore financial aid options to avoid a future of ramen noodle dinners.
6. Avoid the Comparison Trap
Don’t ask your child about their friends’ application statuses or grades. This could lead to unnecessary stress and unrealistic expectations. Admission to top-tier schools can be tough, and comparison is not helpful.
7. Limit Parent-to-Parent Chats
It’s probably best to mute other parents for the year. While you might feel confident about your child’s prospects, hearing about other kids’ achievements can be demoralizing. Plus, people tend to exaggerate—trust me, it’s true!
8. Hold Off on Merchandise
Don’t buy any school swag until you receive those acceptance letters. It’s bad luck and a waste of money—especially if your child doesn’t get in.
9. Respect Their Space
If you find out about an acceptance before your child does, refrain from calling them at 5 AM while they’re on a trip in a different time zone. They might appreciate the news later, but they won’t appreciate the early wake-up call!
10. Remember, It’s Not About You
Focus on your child’s choices and desires. Their college selection is about them and their future—not your dreams or regrets. Set the stage for them to choose their own path.
May the college admissions journey be as smooth as possible, and may all of your child’s aspirations come to fruition. And hey, maybe yours will too!
For more insights on family planning and parenting, don’t miss our other posts, like this one at Home Insemination Kit.
Summary: Navigating the college application process can be a daunting experience for parents of seniors. By stepping back and allowing your child to take the lead, avoiding comparisons, and planning financially, you can help keep stress levels down and ensure a smoother journey for everyone involved. Remember, it’s all about supporting your child in their choices, not imposing your own dreams onto them.