Pregnancy is often portrayed as a magical journey filled with glowing moments and blissful anticipation. But let’s be real—there’s a lot more going on beneath the surface, and it can be downright revolting at times.
Sure, you’ll find countless books, websites, and emails promising to guide you through this experience, but let’s face it: they rarely tell you the whole truth. So, if you’re ready for the unvarnished reality of pregnancy, here it is.
Delightful Pregnancy Hemorrhoids
First, let’s talk about those delightful pregnancy hemorrhoids. You might feel like you’ve got a raw bunch of cauliflower hanging out back there. Yes, they can bleed, itch, and make simple tasks like sitting down feel like a monumental challenge. And if your partner thinks it’s cute to give you a little slap on the rear as you walk by, just know that it might feel like a fiery explosion between your cheeks, sending you into a temporary visual blackout.
Swelling in Your Nether Regions
Next up, there’s the lovely swelling in your nether regions. Picture a baboon from a National Geographic documentary—yep, that’s you! Your lady bits are feeling the pressure from that little bundle, and crossing your legs? Forget it! You’ll be grateful that your growing belly blocks the view of this alarming transformation.
Numbness in Your Vagina
And did you know your entire vagina can go numb? It’s true! You could be lounging in a chair, stand up, and suddenly be completely unaware of your pelvic region. Blame it on the swelling and pressure from your growing baby, who now weighs a whopping three pounds.
Bathroom Trips
Oh, and that insert gross detail here you might be dealing with? Totally normal! Just try not to panic when your bathroom trips turn into scenes worthy of a horror film.
Varicose Veins
If your legs are beginning to resemble a complex highway map, you’re not alone! Those varicose veins are the summer shame of pregnancy, courtesy of the pressure from your precious little one. The aching sensation? Just a friendly reminder that there’s a traffic jam on the expressway of your legs.
Obsessing Over Home Life
You may also find yourself obsessing over the minutiae of your home life. Suddenly, the paint color in your entryway is the most pressing issue at 2 AM, or you might feel compelled to clean out the kitchen cabinets for the third time.
The Silver Lining
The silver lining? About 90% of what you’re experiencing is completely normal, even if it feels disturbing. Hemorrhoids typically fade after childbirth, and varicose veins can improve, too—plus, there are treatments available if needed. On the flip side, pregnancy can be a painful and embarrassing journey that’s far from the dreamy experience you might have envisioned since childhood.
It’s perfectly okay to dislike pregnancy while still looking forward to motherhood. Don’t feel like a failure if your experience doesn’t align with the fairy tale you imagined. It’s all going to be okay, even if you find yourself counting down the days until this challenging chapter is over. If you’re curious about home insemination, check out this helpful post on our other blog, Home Insemination Kit.
In Summary
In summary, pregnancy can be a wild ride filled with discomfort, quirks, and surprises that aren’t always pleasant. But remember, it’s okay not to love every moment of it. Embrace the chaos, and know that you’re not alone in this journey.